Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Oatmeal Cream Pies, found over at Blooming on Bainbridge. The printable version of the recipe is at the bottom of this page.
It was my turn to choose this week’s recipe, and after the past few weeks of dinner-type recipes, I was wanting to choose a dessert or an appetizer or a snack. But none of the recipes in my huge and ever-growing stack appealed to me. I was at a loss. And then came Twitter. I stumbled across an exchange between Erica and Mrs. Irritation that led me to the above-linked recipe for oatmeal cream pies.
Now, anyone out there who hasn’t had a Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pie, I feel sorry for you because they are awesome and amazing and always a favorite around here. As soon as I saw the recipe, I knew I was going to make them, with or without Nance joining in. Luckily, she was up for it.
What I liked the most about the recipe is that everything that it called for, I had in the pantry or the fridge. Recipes that don’t require me to go out to the grocery store are always the best.
These are the ingredients for the cookie part of the recipe – if you hadn’t guessed, first you make the cookies, then you make the filling, then you slap it all together and shove it in your face. So the cookies consist of butter, brown sugar, white sugar, flour, oats, an egg (not pictured), vanilla, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon.
After you start your oven to preheating and line your cookie sheets with parchment paper (or I guess those silicone pan liners would work, too), you’re going to cream your sugars and your butter together ’til it’s creamy.
While that’s mixing, run over to the other end of your counter, and spoon your flour into a measuring cup and then level it with a knife. Dump your flour into a bowl, add baking soda, salt and cinnamon, and stir it together. Add the oats and then mix it all together well.
Then add your dry ingredients to your wet, and mix well.
Once everything is mixed together well, get out your handy-dandy 1-Tablespoon scoop – I have this one, I SUPPOSE you could use an actual tablespoon – then scoop up your dough and drop it 2″ apart on your parchment-lined baking sheets.
Why yes, my baking sheets DO need a good scrubbing. They’re not DIRTY, they’re just stained, and did I ask your opinion on the matter? I did not. Go over there and stand with the cinnamon and baking soda, which is also being judgmental. Y’all can mock the cleanliness of my kitchen together.
The next step is very important if you want to be stupid like me: set the timer for 10 minutes and then wander off to do something. Do not allow it to enter your mind that perhaps you should check the cookies a few minutes earlier just in case they cook more quickly than expected. In the 10 minutes after I put the first cookie sheet in the oven, I think I actually forgot that I was making something. I was folding towels when the timer went off, and I was momentarily puzzled, all “?”
Ten minutes is too long in my oven; your mileage may vary.
The next pan I took out at nine minutes, and the third pan cooked for eight and a half. Eight and a half seems to be the perfect amount of time in my oven – at least, this time. Next time could be different.
It is entirely possible that the cookies got so well-done at ten minutes because I wasn’t using quite enough dough – I ended with 44 cookies instead of the 36 the recipe said I’d get, so there’s that. I probably should have gone with more of a heaping scoop-full rather than an even scoop-full.
While the cookies were cooling, I made the filling. I didn’t get a picture of the filling ingredients, but I think y’all know what butter, vanilla, powdered sugar, and whipping cream look like, don’t you?
I made a double batch of the filling, because I’m pretty sure that you can never have too much filling.
So I put the softened butter into the mixing bowl, sifted the powdered sugar on top of that, and then added the vanilla.
Because I had so much powdered sugar in the bowl, I turned it on low and then moved to put my hands at the top of the bowl so as to minimize the amount of powder that came flooping out of the bowl.
Guess who’s a clumsy asshole? I hit the speed lever thingy with my big stupid klutzy hand and voi-fucking-la:
There was a crapload of it on the floor, too. Thank god for my Dyson handheld vacuum. I thought about tossing everything in a container for the chickens (chickens adore anything powdery. If it’s sweet, so much the better) and starting over with the filling. But I opted instead to keep going, and just add half a cup of powdered sugar and hope for the best. Once the sugar, butter and vanilla was combined, I added four tablespoons of whipping cream and then turned it on high for a couple of minutes.
Luckily, it turned out just fine.
I took no pictures of the process, but basically I used the same 1-tablespoon scoop to scoop up the filling and put it between two cookies, which is simple enough, and there you go.
The verdict? OMG SO GOOD. We gave the crunchy, overcooked cookies to the chickens, but the ones that I cooked for eight and a half minutes? PERFECT. SO tasty.
(Though as Fred said, you could put buttercream frosting between two pieces of cardboard, and it’d still taste good.)
I don’t know that I agree that they’re like the Little Debbie oatmeal cream pies – I mean, they are similar, but there’s a difference in the consistency of the cookies. They are certainly really, really good, and homemade always trumps the chemical bombs you can buy in the store. Fred liked them even more than I did, so I’ll definitely be making these again.
Ever since I said no to seafood for this site (meaning we will never tandem test a seafood recipe – Robyn can put up as many seafood recipes as she wants here) I have felt obligated (say that with a drawn out sigh, hee) to okay every single thing that Robyn sends my way. It’s like Catholic guilt, minus the Catholic. I have no idea why I make ridiculous rules like this for myself, but it does give me something to bitch about and having something to bitch about pretty much makes my world go ’round in case you haven’t noticed. And boy, I did some bitching when it came to this recipe. I’ll be honest here…when I first saw the site I was instantly judgmental over all that pink business. I was rolling my eyes hard and wondered where in the hell Robyn found this crackpot site. And then I started reading the site because I am a certified nebshit* and found that I liked it. She’s totally not my thing with all that pink and whatnot, but damn she’s so FREAKING HAPPY that you kinda have to like her. So I definitely recommend this site if you’re one of those people that is completely over reading the boo-hoo, woe is me blogs (who ‘dat?). So yeah, Nance has a heart after all. Small and mostly black, but it’s there enough to say okay to a blog that’s perky and pink!
But I still had my issues. Like where is the freaking recipe so I can print it? Wait. What? The recipe is a picture? You have got to be kidding me. I may have ended up thinking she has a cute site, but I still think she should (in the interest of her readers because sometimes they matter too) have typed up the recipe in a printable format. Lucky for you, Robyn typed that bitch up down below so you’ll be good to go. She’s a smart one, our Robyn.
As most of you know, I had weight loss surgery a gazillion years ago. The reason that I bring this up is because one of the side effects of the surgery is a thing called dumping syndrome. Not to be confused with the dumps because ohhellno, would I have a surgery that made me shit my pants if I ate the wrong thing. My version of dumping syndrome means that I instantly start sweating and do not feel well at all. And by not feeling well I mean I have to go lay down somewhere. And then when it’s over my blood sugar bottoms out so bad that I need to take two glucose tablets. Everyone has a different version of this syndrome and some people don’t get it at all. I’m not going to mention any names but there are certain people who do not fear the wrath of too much sugar intake (cough:robyn:cough) As soon as I looked at this recipe I knew I was done for. The frosting alone would kill me – 2 cups of confectioners sugar mixed with a stick of butter? This was not going to end well. Sigh.
Hey, guess who didn’t have her butter softened in time? I had this shit in the freezer.
I chopped it up and threw it in the microwave for a bit. I’m not going to give you a time on this because everybody’s microwave is different. That makes me nervous when people give out the time to microwave something. It may take me 10 seconds on high and someone else’s microwave could take a whole minute. I always chop it first because if you throw a solid stick in there sometimes it looks like it’s softened, but the inside is liquid. Oops!
Action shot because I get bored and every fat fatty knows that this is the absolutely best part of the cookie making process. Butter and brown sugar, ftw. I really get annoyed with taking pictures while I cook so you have to endure my action shots. It’s required by law. And also, Robyn is a COPYCAT because I see her up there taking action shots. Hmph.
This looks kinda strange to me, but I can’t figure out why.
I actually busted out with the cookie scoop to do these. And I used the silicone whatever the hell it’s called to make the cookies rather than parchment paper. I treat parchment paper like it’s the rarest thing on the planet because it’s so freaking expensive. I know it’s pathetic. I know.
You gotta love a man who will do your dishes for you. And also, my mom. I cannot tell you how freaking wonderful it is to have those two knuckleheads help me out with clean-up when I’m creating/destroying in the kitchen.
My cookies did not look like the ones on the recipe website. AT ALL. And then it dawned on me that I forgot to add the additional quarter cup of butter. I had thawed two sticks (1 cup of butter) and was planning on using a quarter cup from my butter dish and completely forgot. Ugh, I’m such a dumb-ass (shut-up, Jane)! So we added the extra butter by hand. The next batch flattened out a wee little bit. So we tried it with parchment paper and they flattened out more, but not as much as the website and not as much as Robyn’s. I have no idea where I screwed them up.
The family verdict: They were good, but don’t bother making them again. The frosting was too sweet for everyone so I ended up throwing it away and we’re just eating them as regular ol’ oatmeal cookies. I may have overcooked them a bit because they were pretty hard. And today they are really hard (as in, I’m not risking tooth breakage). But I can honestly say that this is not a bad cookie at all (if you make it right) and you can always tweak the frosting to your liking.
*Pittsburgh speak meaning a nosy person. Not to be confused with noisy. I’m pretty quiet for the most part.
- 1¼ c. butter, softened
- 1 c. packed brown sugar
- 1½ c. flour
- 3 c. oats
- 1 egg
- 2 t. vanilla
- 1 t. baking soda
- ½ t. salt
- ¼ t. cinnamon
- Cream Filling:
- ½ c. soft butter
- 1 t. vanilla
- 2 c. powdered sugar
- 1 - 2 T whipping cream
- For the cookies:
- Preheat the oven to 375F.
- Beat butter and sugar until creamy.
- Add egg & vanilla and mix well.
- Lightly spoon flour into dry measuring cups and level with the flat edge of a knife. Combine flour, soda, salt & cinnamon in a bowl; stir. Add oats and mix well.
- Add the dry ingredients to the butter mix and mix well.
- Drop by rounded tablespoons 2" apart on baking sheets lined with parchment paper.
- Bake at 375 for 8 - 10 minutes. Leave on pan to cool for 2 minutes.
- Remove to wire rack to finish cooling.
- Spread 1 T cream filling between 2 cookies.
- For cream filling:
- Cream the butter, sugar, and vanilla together on low. When it's well mixed, add whipping cream and beat on medium - high for about 2 minutes, until light & fluffy.