Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Chicken Noodle Hold the Soup. Printable recipe can be found at the bottom of this post. The original recipe can be found over at The Rachael Ray Show
Robyn’s Take: This is our first reader-submitted recipe, sent to use by Nicole D!
I don’t know a whole lot about Rachael Ray except that she shills a $20 “garbage bowl”, and so help me if any of you buy a damn bowl ESPECIALLY to put your kitchen garbage in, I will come knock on your door and slap you into next Tuesday, because that is some ridiculous-ass shit. It always confuses me when a specialist – ie, a cook – gets a five-day-a-week show.
I mean, you’re a cook or a cardiothoracic surgeon (Dr. Oz, lookin’ at you), what on earth makes anyone think you need an ENTIRE show where you, I assume, do things other than cook or perform surgery? But I guess she’s had her show for several years now and it’s still going, so there you go. Speaking of Dr. Oz, is it just me or does that man recommend a HUGE number of supplements? If you took every supplement he recommended, you’d be eating nothing but supplements all day long. ANYway.
A chicken, removed from the bone and kind of shredded (the recipe called for a rotisserie chicken; we have a freezer full of chicken, so I cooked one in the crock pot and used that), peas, carrots, onion, celery, zucchini, egg noodles, olive oil, salt and pepper, and a bit of butter. The original recipe called for parsley, but I don’t do parsley so I left it out (the world would be a better place if parsley was left out of everything.)
Cook your egg noodles!
Put a large skillet over medium-high heat, and add your olive oil. Add the carrots, celery, and onion to the pan and cook until the veggies start to get tender, 3 – 4 minutes.
Add the zucchini and some salt and pepper to the pan, and cook for another couple of minutes, until all the veggies are tender.
This is the point when my noodles were done cooking, so I feel obligated to show you what noodles sitting in a colander look like.
Fascinating, no? I love the hell out of that colander; it’s made of silicone and it’s collapsible, so in theory it takes up less space. I mean, when I’m the one who puts it away, it takes up less space. The issue comes when Fred does the dishes. First he tries to take up half the damn dishwasher with that thing, and then when I yell at him for the fact that I’ll have to run the dishwasher with just that colander and two spoons and ask why he’s trying so hard to kill Mother Earth, he washes the colander and puts it away uncollapsed so it takes up the entire cabinet. When it’s collapsed it sits unobtrusively to the side, but when it’s not, it’s VERY FUCKING OBTRUSIVE. But I love it, so it’s staying.
Anyway. Add the chicken and peas to your pan of veggies, and let everything heat through.
Not shown: Adding butter to the noodles and tossing to coat. To serve, spoon chicken and veggie mixture over the noodles.
Really, just not impressive. It was okay, it wasn’t bad – we ate it for two meals and then Fred took the rest for leftovers – but it was pretty boring and bland. It could have used more spices (don’t try to tell me that it would have been better if I’d used the parsley. Parsley would have taken it from “meh” to inedible.) or maybe Rachael Ray in attendance to say “EVOO”, but all I know for sure is that I won’t be making this again.
Have a recipe you want us to make? Check out our new page (there’s also a link to that page up there under the banner) and follow the instructions to submit a recipe!
Okay, I’m going to admit it. I cannot stand Rachael Ray. I remember watching her on the Food Network and she drove me nuts with her 30 minute meals. 30 minutes if you buy a bunch of pre-sliced and expensive ingredients! And the real truth on why I can’t stand her…I think she’s a fake-laugher. I cannot stand people who fake chuckle, giggle or laugh. Nobody should ever fake something in order to appear like they have charm. She does it all the time and if you don’t believe me, watch her closely. Fake laugher. Fake grin. Fake Smile. Fake, fake, fake, fake, fake!
Although I do believe her boobs are real. See below.
You can’t possibly know how annoyed I was that I had to watch her cooking segment to get the gist of this recipe. Or it might have been to see how to “matchstick” vegetables correctly. Shut-up.
Rick picked up the rotisserie chicken for me since it was on his way home from work. This came from Sam’s Club and we call it a Pickin’ Chicken because sometimes we’ll grab one of these and pick at it all day like a bunch of gross carnivores. Then I throw it in a big pot of water to get all of the meat off of it and make chicken and dumplings (the real kind).
This is what it looked like after having been in the refrigerator overnight. Um, gross.
I had no idea what flat-parsley is and it didn’t matter because when I went to the grocery store they only had Italian Parsley. Who knew there were so many different types of parsley out there? Not me, man. Maybe there aren’t that many types. Maybe there is just flat and Italian and I’m just stupid. Hmm.
This is a carrot and vegetable peeler. I am not really good at peeling shit. When I have to peel potatoes (I avoid it like the plague) I use a knife and hack away at it. I may lose some of the potato, but I’m okay with that. There is nothing more annoying than peeling the skin off of anything (Silence of the Lambs – WOOT). Okay, I just grossed myself out. We’re not going to talk about it anymore.
As you can see, I muddled through. The recipe is really simple to make (although not quite as simple as Rachael Ray made it seem). The biggest pain in the ass and time-suck for me was getting all of the vegetables peeled, cut, and thrown into the pan.
I salt and peppered the shit out of those vegetables. The recipe calls for cooking them 3-4 minutes, but I cooked the shit out of those bad boys because I don’t care for vegetables. Zucchini? Get real. I don’t need a crunch to tell me that I’m eating a vegetable. I prefer mine to be cooked beyond recognition and then I’m all about them. What? At least they’re not deep-fried!
Decapitation brought to you by DCEP! Shirley (aka: mom) cracked my shit up when I opened the refrigerator this morning and found the bottom half of that bunch in a plastic baggie. She was cooking with me and either she has even less of a clue about parsley than I do or she was just on a roll cleaning up and not paying attention. Either way, I got a chuckle out of it. A real chuckle. Not to be confused with a Rachael Ray chuckle.
I was in a hurry so I used one of Rick’s tricks to cook the noodles. You know how the instructions say to bring water to a boil and then add the noodles? Rick just adds them right away. I flip out every time I catch him doing it. But I was in a hurry so the noodles went into the pot and I was all, “Boil, goddammit, BOIL!”
Don’t tell Rick.
Action shot! Please Note: Those vegetables are seriously COOKED (and some of them even look like worms).
Noodles with chopped parsley. You don’t know how badly I just wanted to add a shit-ton of parmesan cheese and call that dinner. But I soldiered on because I’m trying to be good about this bullshit recipe site with a weird name. Sigh.
It was really very good. And that’s saying something coming from a vegetable hater like myself. It’s going into the rotation for sure. Whoever picked this (I don’t pay attention, I figure Robyn will know) did a good job because it’s the first Rachael Ray recipe that has ever made it in to my recipe book!
- 1 whole cooked chicken (rotisserie from the grocery store, if you must), removed from bone and torn into small pieces or shredded
- 2 tablespoons Olive Oil (extra-virgin, if you want. Who can tell the difference? Not ME)
- 1 thinly sliced medium onion
- 3 carrots, cut into matchsticks
- 4 ribs celery, cut into matchsticks
- 2 small zucchini, cut into matchsticks
- Salt and pepper
- 1 pound egg noodles (medium or extra wide)
- 1 T butter
- ½ cup (about a handful) flat-leaf parsley, chopped (If you must)
- 5 oz frozen peas, thawed
- Cook your noodles according to the instructions on the box and drain. Put the noodles back into the pot they were cooked in and add butter and parsley, and toss to coat (you can do all this while you're making the chicken and veggies if you think you won't screw it up.)
- Put a large skillet over med-high heat, add olive oil. If you're feeling feisty, call it "EVOO" and roll your eyes.
- When the pan is hot, add carrots, onion, and celery to the pan. Cook 4 - 5 minutes, stirring occasionally, until the vegetables start to get tender.
- Add the zucchini to the pan and add salt and pepper (to taste) and cook another 2 - 3 minutes, until all the vegetables are tender.
- Add chicken and peas to the pan and cook until heated through.
- To serve, put noodles in a bowl and spoon the chicken and vegetable mixture on top.
I’ve never been on the Rachael Ray train either (the titter, the giggle, the grin, and most of all the mortal sin of her signally sickening asinine acronym for extra virgin olive oil). But she did give a ton o’ money — 500 grand — to the ASPCA after Hurricane Sandy, softening my hard, hard heart.
So Nance, the next time Robyn and Fred come a’knockin, you’ll be serving this up, right?
Good on her for giving money to the ASPCA after the hurricane, but people can do a lot of great things and still be annoying. 🙂
Fred never comes a’knockin because he’s a hermit and I would never give Robyn something I know she doesn’t like when she visits (although I have made things that were huge Fails before, hee).
Hmm, “The Hermit of Crooked Acres” would be a tantalizing title for a horror book — or the memoir of a saint.
And don’t worry, Nance, my slack-cutting for La Ray came to a quick end. (and not having cable — because I was an addict, not because I was an Amanda) makes it easy to avoid her.) The title for this recipe is SO HER, isn’t it?
The time I visited and we had pizza for just about every meal was AWESOME. 🙂
I’m sayin’! We’re totally going to have to do it again – I have new pizza places you need to try out now!
Nobody can say we’re not the coolest.
And also, I seem to recall that I mocked you for actually OWNING THE RACHAEL RAY GARBAGE BOWL.
Don’t lie. 😉
No, you mocked me for bitching about the idea of buying a bowl specifically for kitchen garbage twice in the space of, like, a month.
My “kitchen garbage bowl” is a bucket we call “the chicken bucket.” Rachael Ray needs a flock of chickens if she’s going to keep generating bowls full of kitchen garbage.
And a sackload of figurative bols for all theverbalrubbish shegenerates. Cue hermirthless laugh.
I could have sworn you had that bowl! I didn’t think you used it for garbage, but damn I thought I saw it at your house. Maybe I am losing my mind!
Am I the only one who can’t stand her voice? Sounds like she’s been smoking weed for years!
I’m guessing that she has some kind of polyps. I should be a betting woman so that when they announce her upcoming surgery I’ll be a gazillionaire!
Either that or she’s a heavy drinker/smoker and then they’re going to come out with she’s been hospitalized for dehydration (aka: rehab).
This is all “allegedly” of course. 😉
Proceeds from her dog food go to animals too. She drives me nuts too. I did buy the dog food a couple times because I had a coupon.
The laugh, her stories and her abbreviations are really annoying. I saw her cook bacon in EVOO on the show once. Why do you need oil to cook bacon?
The hell? Are you kidding about the bacon? Who in the hell adds oil to BACON. My mom heard the YouTube of her and she was all, “What’s that?” when dingbat said EVOO and I just said it was it was…
This grown ass woman thinks it’s cute to abbreviate Extra Virgin Olive Oil. Ugh! She makes me crazy with her fakey-fake bullshit.
I love you guys.
I hate Rachel Ray.
Dr. Oz is just weird. And my mother thinks everything he says is gospel. Gah!
I have no opinion of Dr. Oz because I don’t really know that much about him – is he an Oprah dude? I saw an article in a magazine once from him about what he keeps in his pantry and I was all, “OHHELLNO” because I like real food and I don’t want to live that long if I have to miserable while doing it.
Thanks for the love, Cetta. It makes me smile when people “get” what this site is all about.
My mother is the same way about Dr, Oz and drives us all crazy, My hair stylist thinks he looks like Dr. Spock. before Dr. Oz it was Montel Williams. I’m just glad it’s not Dr. Phil. HE really annoys me.
Late to the party as usual but I’m glad to see others hate Dr. Phil too. Your comments make me laugh my fat ass off.
Intrigued by this recipe! But I’m with Robyn, it seems like it would be a bit bland. Maybe adding chopped garlic to the veggies would spice things up? :\
p.s.-LOVE this site and what ya’ll are doing here. Keep it up! 🙂
You can never have too much garlic!!!
Exactly the philosophy I live by!
Two reasons I know my son Trey was switched at birth. He doesn’t like garlic and he doesn’t like butter. CONFIRMED.
And I’m with you on the garlic love! But honestly, it had plenty of flavor so I don’t know where Robyn is getting that it’s so bland. WEIRDO.
I’m betting that most of the flavor in yours comes from the fact that you bought a seasoned rotisserie chicken and that it depends on how Robyn did hers in the crock pot. if it was just water or broth and chicken cooking, there’s the difference. 🙂
Nance-we have one big reason to believe our daughter was switched at birth-she doesn’t like mashed potatoes, or baked potatoes, or any potatoes that aren’t French fries. How she can be of my gene pool and not love mashed potatoes? It is beyond me!
The recipe does seem like it would be a bit bland, it reminds me of something you would get at a Chinese restaurant, but with egg noodles.
My son will not eat cheese. Until he was five years old, he demanded that we peel the cheese off his pizza slice. He cried whenever his sisters ate goldfish or cheez-it crackers in his presence because he hated the smell. I thought he was an alien. If he didn’t look just like his father, I’d still question his authenticity.
What would we all do if we didn’t have garlic? I would be so incredibly sad. The only time I didn’t like garlic was when I worked in a doctor’s office and the older people came in reeking of it (they took the supplement pills). There were days that I wanted to duck under the desk when some of them were standing there talking to me!
Pro-Tip: When taking garlic supplements, spend the extra and buy the “odorless” ones.
Those supposed “quick” meals on cooking shows drive me nuts. sure it’s quick- if you have a sous chef ( I know chef terms cause my son is working his way through the ranks) prepping your stuff for you. the local news has a cooking segment once a week and the chef takes less than 5mins to put it all together. HA! everything is prepared like stock, cooked meat…the recipe would take at least an hour to make! arghgh
hate Rachael Ray and Dr Oz. and Dr Phil too- who manages to schill his book within 10 mins of every show.
Do NOT get me started on Oprah. loved the show when I was a teen but as her money piled up, so did her sanctimonious bs. shudder.
oh yeah, the recipe is what I’m supposed to be commenting on….
it looks good but needs flavour. parsley isn’t a flavour. it’s a garnish.
throw in some garlic and maybe some summer savory to give it something. I would try making this.
I actually chopped all my veggies and pulled the chicken off the bone earlier in the day so that when it came time to throw it together, it WAS fast, but who wants to do that all the time?
Parsley IS a flavor – it’s the flavor of DIRT. Blech. 🙂
Personally I hate parsley because it sticks in my damn teeth. And I normally never use it (probably why Shirley put the ends in the fridge and why I had no idea what to buy).
I don’t like weeds in my food. Yuck.
Dr. Phil reminds me of a typical douche. I don’t think I would like him at all in real life. I KNOW I don’t like him on television!
You can borrow my sous chef. Dude keeps making huge mounds of julienned veggies and buckets of stock, and I don’t even cook.
I would bet that Nance’s was more flavorful than Robyn’s because of the store-bought chicken. Might be best to use a seasoned rotisserie chicken, or season the chicken heavily before you mix it all up.
I would bet that you’re a genius, Fay!
If you look on the label of my chicken you would see something about being Sam’s Club being in cahoots with Lowry’s Seasoning Salt. I get mad at Rick because he loves eating that skin and it’s loaded with that crap.
Yay! You picked my recipe! I am honored 🙂
I am glad you liked it (Nance). It is one of my favorites and in my rotation. And yes, Italian = flat leaf parsley.
P.S. I am sorry that you were annoyed by Rachael Ray. I actually like her (insert blushy face).
There is only one other kind of parsley, which is curly parsley (the kind they put on the plate as a garnish).
You’re not alone in the Rachael Ray love, I suspect, Nicole. If people didn’t love her, she wouldn’t be a bazillionaire. (Even if some of those bazillions came from the damn garbage bowl. Heh.)
And thanks for the submission!
Oh, I am so glad that there are only two types of parsley. That saves me a lot of headache because I do not need to be fretting about parsley when I have enough to fret about.
I’m with Robyn on the Rachael Ray thing. There’s a reason so many people watch her – maybe I’m just being a bitch. Nah. Couldn’t be.
RR reminds me of a couple of my sisters…so I am both annoyed and kind of like watching her at the same time. It is a familiar kind of annoyance.
Although I haven’t seen her stuff in a few years though as the food network is being overrun by competition ‘reality’ shows
Rick bought the chicken at Sam’s Club?! The Sam’s Club that’s been dissing you?!
Yes! It was on his way home from work and it was the only game in town to find a rotisserie chicken. I didn’t cheat like Robyn did. 😉
The good news is that we’re going to head on out to Costco next weekend and get ourselves a card. It’s going to be a hassle (because it’s so far away), but with careful planning and a cooler in the trunk, we should be fine. Fuck Sam’s Club. Their customer service blows!
Good for you, Nance!
Hmph! I love parsley, can I still play here? I do not like either Rachel Ray or Dr. Oz.
By the way, Nance, flat leaf parsley and Italian are the same thing. Wonder why RR didn’t just call it Italian parsley, since that’s how it’s labeled in every grocery store, produce stand, farmer’s market, seed store I’ve ever been to.
We ban people who love parsley. (KIDDING.) I bet you love that damn cilantro, too, don’t you? 🙂
Knowing the way some people are I wouldn’t be surprised if she called it that because someone might get offended for calling it Italian. People be Crazy, sometimes!
I don’t like cilantro. I thought that I did, but nah, I don’t care if it’s in my food (at a restaurant), but I’ll never put it in any of my food on purpose.
Hanging head in shame; I love cilantro. Now I’ll have to change my name so I can still read DCEP.
When I read this in my email, I laughed out loud. You don’t have to change your name, Maxie. But we will be watching to see what other food atrocities you like. Hee!
I personally couldn’t care one way or the other about parsley – but I LOVE cilantro! Love love love the stuff. but forgive you for your attitude about it. 🙂
Rachael Ray pisses me off too. I was “meh” on her until that damn “garbage bowl” nonsense. My husband and I use empty big yogurt containers for our “garbage bowl”. Who pays good money for a “garbage bowl”? I also hate her dog food commercial where her dog walks away and she says “See ya” like she’s some sort of cutesy pootsy person. She seems like a big FAKE to me too. (Apparently I have FEELINGS about her.)
I have not seen the dog food commercial, but now I need to!
What sort of sick mind takes an innocent bowl and turns it into a rubbish receptacle? Back where I come from (and yes, I am alluding to wee Kenny Chesney), we have these things called garbage bags. Since we don’t live in palaces, they’re surprisingly close to the food-prep areas. People, be kind to your bowls, even the one holding your flat-leaf parsley.
Are you implying that Kenny Chesney is “wee”…because maybe that’s why Renee Zellwiger divorced him, hmmm?
OMG, I need a life!
I was merely referring to his stature. I can’t
imagine what you’re on about, Nance. Also, I believe you have a very full — and fun — five-star-filled life!
I’m so low-brow that I thought the bowl was really nice and would have used it in my kitchen for making cakes, etc.
Except for the fact that it’s so damn expensive. Sheesh!
Robyn knows how to make a crockpot chicken that tastes like a rotisserie chicken from the store, PEOPLE. It’s not my first time at the rodeo, and it wasn’t the chicken.
The very best thing about these responses — and there are so many goodies — is that Robyn from the rodeo is now referring to herself in the third person. You go, girl!
I sure have missed the kind of comments Robyn and Nance generate. Real snickering, giggling and laughing going on here!
Well, Robyn it is obviously the damn parsley then!
HUSH, YOU, OR THE KITTEN GETS IT.
Someone doesn’t take criticism well…
It sure is hard when raising a chicken from an egg and freezing it is called ‘cheating’
But, but, but, but, but… I *have* a garbage bowl! Well, kind of. It holds 13 gallons of trash and fits in the cupboard under the kitchen sink. Oh wait. That’s a garbage CAN! It comes out of the cupboard and stands right next to me on the floor, just waiting for me to drop the garbage inside of it. And when I’m done?? It goes BACK in the cupboard! Thanks Rach, for that original idea 😉
I will admit to purchasing her dog food. Not the oddly named “Nutrish” but the “Just 6” variety which supposedly only has 6 (creative name, huh?) ingredients which might be better for my dog full of allergies. He’s had it a time or two and it didn’t kill him.
Please don’t judge me for buying her dog food. I live 10 miles away from the nearest animal specialty store and the local Kroger is sometimes lacking in quality dog food.
No judgement for buying the dog food! I have to admit, I’d probably be interested if there were a “Just 6” cat food (there isn’t, is there?) and tempted to give it a try!
Hey, Robyn, with all the chickens you have, I wonder if you’ve ever thought of making your own cat food. Too much work?
Are you telling her that she should kill the chickens in order to feed her cats? There is something SO wrong about that. Hee!
I have actually tried to make cat food from our chickens, but the cats wouldn’t touch it. Which, you know, FINE, I’ll just open cans, you damn ungrateful cats.
First they don’t bother learning your name and then they scorn your victuals? Lucky they’re so damned cute!
Do you have to walk that 10 miles? If so, then I won’t judge you. 😉
Nance, I believe chicken “processing” already takes place at Crooked Acres. Am I wrong? (If so, that would hardly be a first!) PS I always give you five stars, but they never show up. I swear!
Addendum: And now that Robyn is referring to herself in the third person, would I ever DARE tell her what to do? Hell to the no!
I have no comment. I don’t think I’d like this recipe since I don’t really like chicken, or noodles, or veggies..HA. There were no Sadie pictures, and I hate garlic. I just commented with my no comment so I could add stars!
Mental note: Get picture of Sadie before Cathy loses her mind. And thanks for the stars? I’m still not sure what they do, but someday I’ll figure it out.
Dear Cathy, what do you EAT? (If you hate chicken, noodles, veggies and garlic). I am thinking red meat and potatoes? Just curious, my internet friend! 😉
Reasonable question Kristen!! I like meat, but have some issues digesting it (bet you’re glad you asked now!!!) I like to eat everything that’s served for breakfast, soup, Vietnamese, Thai, pizza, ribs…trust me I’m not starving, I just don’t really like most veggies, garlic and big pieces of chicken!!! 🙂
Hell yes to the Sadie pictures Nance!!!
I bet it could use some chicken broth to spice it up.
Ha – that’s exactly what Fred said!