Roasted Chickpeas (Nance & Robyn make the same recipe)

Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Roasted Chickpeas, found over at The Oprah Blog. Printable recipe can be found at the bottom of this post.

Robyn’s Take:

The recipe this week was my choice, and I’ll be honest – it was only because I had a shitload of canned chickpeas in the pantry. They’ve been sitting there for YEARS, and I wanted to get rid of them. So I googled around and thought and pondered and made a batch of avocado hummus, and then I decided to ask if Nance wanted to make roasted chickpeas and she was all “Yeah, whatever”, and so that’s how I chose this week’s recipe. There are 35 million versions of this recipe, but I chose this one because it was straightforward and easy. I mean, that doesn’t mean I didn’t fuck it up, but imagine how badly it would have gone if I’d chosen one that was complicated.

Ingredients:

1 can of chickpeas/ garbanzo beans, olive oil, spices of your choice. I tasked Fred with choosing the spices we were going to use, and he chose Morton’s Hot Salt and Creole seasoning, but then put the Hot Salt back after I snapped this picture.

Roasted Chickpeas (1)

Open the can and rinse the chickpeas in a colander.

Roasted Chickpeas (2)

Dump the chickpeas onto a rimmed baking sheet lined with paper towels.

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Shake the sheet so that the chickpeas roll around and get mostly dry. I also took a small piece of paper towel and ran it over the top of the chickpeas to help the drying process. Then I realized that, hey. There was still plenty of room left on that baking sheet, so I opened a second can of chickpeas and did it all over again.

Remove the paper towel. Drizzle olive oil over the top of the chickpeas.

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I didn’t measure the amount of olive oil I used, and as a result I used too much and had to grab yet ANOTHER piece of paper towel to soak up some of the olive oil. You want your chickpeas to be lightly coated with olive oil, not swimming in it.

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Then, because I have zero reading comprehension skills, I sprinkled the Creole seasoning over the chickpeas. I failed to take a picture of this, and I shouldn’t even tell y’all that I did it, because YOU would never know. But you’re intended to wait ’til the chickpeas are done and THEN sprinkle seasoning over them, like with popcorn. Honestly, I don’t think it makes a difference whether you do it before roasting or after.

Chickpeas, roasted:

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I roasted mine for 35 minutes, took them out, let them cool a bit, then found that they were still too soft. Whereupon I stuck them back in the oven for another 10 minutes. SIGH.

Roasted chickpeas, in a bowl

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What do the cats think?

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Newt was all “I’ll just chew on that piece of rusted metal, lady, THANKS ANYWAY.”

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Elwood said “I’m not going to eat it. You eat it.”
Kara said “Oh, HELLZ NO.”

What did the people think? They were good. I don’t know that I’m ever going to CRAVE them or anything, but for a crunchy, spicy snack on a Saturday night while watching a bad movie, they’re perfect.

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Nance’s take:

Robyn picks the strangest recipes, man. Everyone knows that I never refuse Robyn’s recipe choices because I told her way back in the day that I will not tandem cook any seafood with her. I’m starting to wonder if this is her way of paying me back…

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This is the second can of chickpeas that has ever been in my house. The first can was when I decided I needed more protein and added them to my salad. Yeah, that went over well. My brain was all, “Whee, this will be a great source of protein!” but my taste buds told me to go fuck myself and eat more cheese.

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I was a little weirded out by the floaties in there.

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Up-close they kind of reminded me of slimy kidney stones. Can you imagine passing kidney stones that looked like this…if you were a guy? Ha! I have no idea why I just went there. And now I am sitting here wondering if I have man-hating issues deep in my brain that I should maybe deal with. Although I could just be sitting here losing my mind because it’s late and I’m tired. I’ll figure it all out tomorrow.

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Shower time!

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Getting ready to dump them on to the paper towel like the “recipe” said.

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I just knew this was going to be a pain in the ass.

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I ended up just ripping the paper towel out from under them and hand-drying the freaking things.

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It’s really hard to hold a camera in one hand while pouring olive oil with the other. I probably used more than what the recipe called for.  True confession:  I did not cover the chickpeas with the oil by rolling my cookie sheet back and forth.  I did get fed up and rolled those little fuckers in the oil with my bare hands.

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I need you to know that I set off the upstairs smoke alarm TWO freaking times during this little chickpea episode. That’s two times more than I wanted to deal with.  And yes, I did salt the shit out of them because hello, they are chickpeas.  I knew a miracle was not going to occur in the oven that would make them taste like chocolate so I decided to hope for potato chips.

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Here they are in a pretty bowl. Guess what? They tasted like shit. Oven-baked little turd balls.  Nobody in the house liked them and we all agreed that chickpeas just do not belong in our lives.

Not a winner this time, but I do appreciate knowing that my smoke alarm is looking out for me and mine.

Roasted Chickpeas (Nance & Robyn make the same recipe)
 
Prep time
Cook time
Total time
 
: snack
Serves: ?
Ingredients
  • 1 can chickpeas
  • 1 T olive oil
  • seasonings of your choice
Instructions
  1. Rinse chickpeas in a colander.
  2. Put chickpeas on a rimmed baking sheet lined with paper towel. Shake the pan lightly to dry off the chickpeas. Remove the paper towel.
  3. Pour 1 T olive oil over the chickpeas, shake the pan to coat the chickpeas.
  4. Bake at 450ºF for 30 - 40 minutes, shaking the pan once or twice to move the chickpeas around.
  5. Chickpeas are done when they're slightly puckered and blistered.
  6. Shake the seasoning of your choice over the chickpeas. Cool and eat.

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Avocado Hummus

The instant I saw this recipe over at A Cozy Kitchen, I knew I was going to have to make it. The next time I was at the grocery store, I grabbed the ingredients that I didn’t already have on hand (avocados and a lemon), and made it the very next day. I love avocados so very, very much, and I knew that since this included chickpeas, it was pretty much health food.

The ingredients:

Hummus (1)

A can of garbanzo beans, lemon, tahini (which has literally been sitting, unopened, in my pantry for like two years now. There’s no date on the can, so I’m assuming it doesn’t go bad), garlic, 2 avocados, salt, olive oil, paprika.

First, I had to zest and juice the lemon. I used this little zester thing I got for free from some site or another (they were having one of those “grab bag” deals where you buy a bag of crap for like $5, and you never know what you’re going to get). I like that it has the thing attached so that the zest doesn’t go everywhere. To juice it, I used my lemon juicer thingy. I could have squeezed it by hand, but I am a delicate flower and don’t have a Shirley to do my bidding (hee), so I use the juicer.

Hummus (2)
Tahini’s all “Bitch, hurry UP.”

Hummus (3)
Yeah, right. Note that the zest didn’t go all over the place. Riiiight. I’m such a slob.

Throw everything but the avocados and salt in a food processor, and give it a whirl ’til it’s smooth. Add salt to taste – and let me tell you here that while you might be tempted to leave the salt out in a misguided attempt to keep your blood pressure low (or whatever health benefit it is that skipping salt gives you; I’m murky on the details, because my doctor’s never told me to watch my salt intake, so I don’t. SO THERE.), if you leave out the salt you’re going to end up with something bland. Add the salt to bring out the flavor, is what you want to do, but don’t go heavy on it.

Does everyone know how to peel an avocado? I’m going to assume not everyone does, because I am late to the love of avocado, and I had a hell of a time the first few times I did it, and I made a big mess and so I’m here to help you out. Because it is so simple and there’s no reason you should be standing in your kitchen swearing at a poor, innocent avocado. Avocados are delicate, and profanities hurt their feelings.

Step one, cut through the avocado skin and flesh until you hit resistance (that would be the pit, in the center). Then cut all the way around.

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You can’t see it in this picture, but there’s a cut all the way around the circumference of the avocado.

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You might need to twist it a little, but the avocado should come apart easily.

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Now here’s how I do it, but this is the wrong way, because if you’re a klutz the tip of the knife will slip and you’ll end up stabbing yourself in the guts, and you KNOW your stupid face is going to be all over those Morons in the News stories. “Alabama housewife eviscerates herself while trying to peel an avocado! She was swarmed by cranky cats. When the cats were done, there was nothing left but an eyeball and her left foot!”

(Completely and totally off topic, you know that movie My Left Foot? I SWEAR to you that Fred thought for many years that it was called My Two Left Feet. He argued HEATEDLY with me that I had the title wrong. That still makes me laugh every single time I think about it.)

ANYway, this is how I do it, I stab the pit with the tip of my knife. What YOU should do is point the knife away from your midsection and smack the sharp edge of the knife down on the pit so that it sticks in the pit.

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Then kind of twist the knife away from the avocado, bringing the pit with it.

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Then you can pull the pit off with your hand, or you can just clunk the knife on the edge of the trash can, causing the pit to fly off.

The skin pulls off really easily.

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And that is how you end up with two naked avocado halves.

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Which you then toss into the food processor, and give it another whirl ’til it’s smooth. Add some salt to taste. I didn’t take any pictures of this part of the preparation, because I’m a slacker. Or I was too busy patting myself on the back for not stabbing myself in the stomach. THIS time.

Transfer the hummus to a bowl, drizzle a bit of olive oil on top, and sprinkle with paprika. Serve with whatever you prefer – we ate ours with pita chips, but I think tortilla chips would have been even better.

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YUM.

 

Avocado Hummus
 
Prep time
Total time
 
: snack, appetiser
Serves: 73
Ingredients
  • 2 garlic cloves
  • 1 15-ounce can of garbanzo beans
  • 1 lemon (zested and juiced)
  • 2 T tahini
  • 2 avocados
  • salt
  • olive oil
  • paprika
Instructions
  1. Place garlic cloves, garbanzo beans, lemon zest, lemon juice, and tahini in a food processor. Blend until smooth. Salt to taste.
  2. Add two avocados (which have been peeled and depitted) and add just until smooth. Salt to taste once more. Transfer to a bowl, drizzle some olive oil on top, and sprinkle with a bit of paprika. Serve with whatever you prefer - tortilla chips, pita chips, crackers, etc.