cake | DCEP

Salted Caramel Sour Cream Cake – Nance and Robyn make the same recipe

Posted on February 18, 2014 by Robyn

Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Salted Caramel Sour Cream Cake. Printable recipe can be found at the bottom of this post. The original recipe can be found over at Oh, Bite It!.

Robyn’s Take:

I don’t remember exactly how this recipe came to my attention, but in my notes I’ve mentioned Connie and Kelly. What I THINK happened is that months and months ago, Connie or Kelly posted the link to the recipe on Facebook with a suggestion that we give it a try, and then Kelly or Connie seconded that motion. So I added it to the list and now we’re finally getting around to it.

Amanda will extra love this recipe because it starts with a boxed cake mix and includes a jar of caramel sauce and frosting from a container.

Your ingredients:

White cake mix, caramel sauce, white frosting, sour cream, and salt.

Step one, make the cake following the directions on the back, and then add in 1/2 cup of sour cream.

Step two, eat some damn batter as you’re pouring it into your 9×13 baking pan. What would be the point of making a cake if you can’t eat some of the batter?

Bake the cake according to the directions on the box.

“I just keep this bag warm ’til the cake is ready.”

When the cake is done, let it cool. Then, using a fork, poke some holes in the cake. First I tried using a regular fork, but the cake kept apart where I’d poked the holes. So then I tried using a serving fork, and same thing. Finally, I decided that “fuck it” was the order of the day (“fuck it” is pretty much ALWAYS the order of the day around here), so I jabbed a bunch of holes in the cake and called it good enough.

Dump half the jar of caramel sauce on top of the cake, and spread it evenly-ish across the top. Then let it sit for 5 minutes, to let the sauce sink in. Meanwhile, prepare your frosting.

To prepare your frosting, dump the frosting into a bowl and mix it with the remaining caramel sauce.

Frost the cake.

Sprinkle your salt evenly over the top of the cake. The original recipe really didn’t give any guidance on this, but I can tell you that I used about 1/4 teaspoon of salt over the whole cake.

Take a terrible picture of the cake.

(Confession: that picture was actually taken after I’d put the cake in the fridge overnight. Otherwise, it wouldn’t have been nearly as neatly cut. It’s a really soft cake, so if you’re insistent on getting pretty, neatly cut pieces of cake, you’re going to need to refrigerate that bad boy.)

The verdict? A resounding “meh.” I like caramel, and I REALLY like salted caramel, but this just didn’t do it for me. Fred rated it a “meh” as well, and I’m not going to make it again.

I do think that if I’d made a buttercream frosting from scratch and used that instead of that nasty canned shit (I’m a frosting snob, I admit it!), it would have been much improved. But I’m not going to bother experimenting, because life’s too short to fiddle around with a recipe that didn’t blow you away.

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Nance’s Take:

“This is my favorite cooking blog, because y’all hate what you make a good percentage of the time, and I like that. Well, that and I’ve been following you two on the internet since the days of coal-burning web browsers.” – Patrick

Ohhh, you don’t even want to know how pissed I am because I really wanted to prove to him that we don’t hate everything and now I’m screwed. I hated this GOD DAMN CAKE so bad that there are not enough swear words on Urban Dictionary.com to describe it.

Let’s start with this hot mess first. Why do I need to use motherfucking parchment paper? That shit is expensive and I try to save it for jelly rolls and certain cookies. Trying to press this into a cake pan was a freaking pain in my ass. And yes, I used the grease the pan first method. Still a pain in my ass.

Cat was very interested. I did not care because I was still mad about that parchment paper.

Julie decided it wasn’t worth her time and by the end of this hot mess I was wishing I followed her lead.

I didn’t even bother with a mixer because my time is precious.

I decided to use a big fork because I could and also because I wanted to make sure the holes were big enough for the caramel to go through.

Action shot.

Rick loves caramel better than chocolate so he was all about this cake. I was dubious because cake, caramel, and frosting are all so full of sugar that I thought this might be some serious goddamn overkill.

I don’t know, man. I just don’t know.

You could smell the fucking sugar.

Artistic shot of the salted shit storm.

Robyn’s going to shit, but I’m about to blow this motherfucker up. This is exactly what I dislike about some food blogs. The enticing description, food styling and photography dazzle all of us so much that nobody ever thinks of the reality. The ingredients and photographs, combined with the blog entry, make for a beautiful looking dessert that everybody wants to make. But the reality is that it’s so fucking sweet it makes your teeth hurt. The ingredients blend with one another so that all you have is a fork full of sugar mixed with a sugar syrup. Absolutely disgusting.

Everyone tried it, nobody would finish their piece, and the entire cake ended up in the garbage can. Total waste of food, money and time. There are times when people are selling you a dream that you need to wake the fuck up and realize that it’s bullshit. Bullshit, coated with more bullshit, and wrapped up in a pretty bullshit picture.

Beware of bullshit.

Salted Caramel Sour Cream Cake - Nance and Robyn make the same recipe

Prep time

20 mins

Cook time

45 mins

Total time

1 hour 5 mins

: Dessert

Cuisine: CAKE

Serves: 12

Ingredients

1 box of White Cake mix
1 - 12 oz. jar of caramel sauce (ice cream topping)
1 - 16 oz container of vanilla frosting
½ c. sour cream
salt for sprinkling (1/4 - ½ tsp)

Instructions

Following the directions on the back of the cake mix, mix the batter and then stir in ½ c. sour cream. In a greased 9x13 baking dish, pour the batter and bake according to the directions.
Let cake cool and then poke holes in it with a fork.
Spread half of the caramel sauce evenly over the top of the cake. Let sit for 5 minutes while preparing frosting.
In a medium bowl, mix frosting and the rest of the caramel sauce until well combined.
Frost cake evenly with frosting, and then sprinkle about ¼ tsp of salt over the top.
*This is a soft cake, so won't cut in neat slices - if neat slices are important to you (you weirdo), refrigerate for a couple of hours before serving.

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Carrot Cake

Posted on December 2, 2013 by Robyn

The tandem recipe will be up later this week!

Back in the early part of this year (before his birthday in May), Fred saw a recipe entitled “Best. Carrot. Cake. Ever.”, and sent me the link to the recipe at Baby Gizmo, asking me to make it for his birthday. I did, and we both agreed that this cake is SO FRIGGIN’ GOOD that we (and by “we” I mean “I”) would be making it many more times.

Of course, the first time I made it I failed to take pictures of it, so y’all have been without this fantastic recipe due to my inadequacies as a food blogger (I almost referred to myself as a “food blogger” without rolling my eyes. ALMOST, I say. Okay, I didn’t even come close – I rolled my eyes so hard I got dizzy and almost passed out.) Last week was Thanksgiving, and when we were tasked with the job of bringing dessert to Thanksgiving, this is the cake that came immediately to mind.

(We also brought Sweet Potato Casserole and sauteed kale. I don’t have a recipe for the sauteed kale. It’s kale. You saute it. DUH.)

Firstly, gather your ingredients. These are just the ingredients for the cake part itself – there’s a whole other picture of the ingredients for the buttermilk glaze, and then a kind of half-assed picture of the ingredients for the frosting. (Why whole-ass it when you can half-ass it, I always say!)

Flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, eggs, sugar, vegetable oil, buttermilk, vanilla, shredded carrots, crushed pineapple, flaked coconut, chopped walnuts.

But wait! Before you make your cake, you must line two round 9-inch cake pans with wax paper, then lightly grease them. I don’t know if y’all know this, but the best and easiest way to line cake pans with wax paper is to lay the cake pan on top of the wax paper, trace around it with a pencil, and then cut just inside the line. Voila! Perfectly sized! I greased the pans with Baker’s Joy spray, because it’s easy.

Stir your dry ingredients (flour, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon) together in a bowl and set it aside.

Then beat your eggs, sugar, oil, buttermilk, and vanilla together until you have a smooth batter. Add the flour mixture (beat it on low, because you don’t want that shit to scatter everywhere). Fold in the carrot, coconut, pineapple, and walnuts (by the way, I expect that pecans would work pretty well in this recipe, too.)

Divide the batter between your two prepared pans, and bake. Now, here is where I ran into an issue. The recipe says to bake for 25 – 30 minutes or until a wooden pick comes out clean. It took 43 minutes for my cakes to be done. Checking the comments of the original recipe, other people ran into that same problem, so the printable recipe at the bottom is going to tell you to bake your cakes for 40 – 45 minutes.

While your cakes are baking, it’s time to make the buttermilk glaze. The ingredients:

Sugar, baking soda, buttermilk, butter, corn syrup, vanilla.

Throw everything but the vanilla in a heavy pot over med-high heat. Bring it to a boil, stirring every now and then. Once it’s boiling, boil for 4 minutes, stirring often. It’ll get all bubbly and turn a golden brown color.

When the four minutes of boiling is up, remove it from the heat, and stir in the vanilla.

When the cakes come out of the oven, pour the buttermilk glaze over the cakes. I used about 2/3 of the glaze – just cover each cake with a nice, thick glaze but don’t flood them.

Leave the glazed cakes in the pans on wire racks for 15 minutes. Then remove the cakes from the pans and let them cool completely on the wire racks.

Now here’s a tip from me to you – when you dump the cakes out of the pans, immediately turn them back over so that they’re top-side (sticky-side) up. Otherwise, the top of the cakes are going to stick to the wire racks and you’re going to be SO annoyed.

If I had flipped this over, there would have been 75% less cursing in my kitchen when it came time to frost the cake.

*Note: the original recipe has you slice each layer in half, so that you end up with 4 layers. I didn’t do that, because I didn’t think it was necessary. You can do it if you want to, but I don’t really see the point. Ordinarily I’d be like “you get more frosting in each piece that way!”, but no. It’s pretty perfect with two layers.

Once the layers are cool, time to make the frosting! Ingredients:

Softened butter, softened cream cheese, powdered sugar, vanilla.

Beat the cream cheese and butter together until they’re creamy. Add powdered sugar and vanilla, and beat until smooth. Add more sugar if need be – I ended up adding about another 3/4 cup of sugar before it was at the consistency I wanted.

Slap down one layer and frost it…

Then the second layer.

Fred was in charge of the frosting because I had other shit to do. I suggested that he color the frosting and pipe a little carrot on top to show everyone how fancy we are, but he didn’t do it. Hmph.

So. Friggin’. YUMMY. And it was a hit at Thanksgiving dinner!

Carrot Cake

Prep time

60 mins

Cook time

45 mins

Total time

1 hour 45 mins

: CAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE

Cuisine: Is carrot cake a Southern thing? It might be!

Serves: 12

Ingredients

Cake:
2 c. all-purpose flour
2 tsp baking soda
½ tsp salt
2 tsp ground cinnamon
3 lg eggs
2 c. sugar
¾ vegetable oil
¾ c. buttermilk
2 tsp vanilla extract
2 c. grated carrots
8 oz. can crushed pineapple, drained
3½ oz flaked coconut
1 c. chopped walnuts
Buttermilk Glaze:
1 c. sugar
1½ tsp baking soda
½ c. buttermilk
½ c. butter
1 T light corn syrup
1 tsp vanilla
Cream Cheese Frosting:
¾ c. butter, softened
12 oz cream cheese, softened
3 c. powdered sugar
1½ tsp vanilla

Instructions

Preheat oven to 350ºF.
Line 2 9-inch round cake pans with wax paper; lightly grease and flour (or use Baker's Secret spray.)
Stir together flour, baking soda, salt and cinnamon in a medium bowl; set aside.
Beat eggs, sugar, oil, buttermilk and vanilla at medium speed until smooth. Add flour mixture (beating at low speed) until blended. Fold in carrot, coconut, pineapple, and walnuts.
Divide batter between prepared cake pans.
Bake at 350ºF for 40 - 45 minutes or until a wooden toothpick comes out clean.
WHILE CAKE IS BAKING, make Buttermilk Glaze. Bring sugar, baking soda, buttermilk, butter and corn syrup to boil in heavy pot over med-high heat. Boil, stirring often, for 4 minutes. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla.
When cakes are done baking, drizzle Buttermilk Glaze evenly over the top of the two cakes. Use about ⅔ of the glaze.
Cool cakes in pans on wire rack for 15 minutes. Then remove from pans and flip over so that they are sticky-side up (so cake won't stick to racks as they cool). Cool completely.
Cream Cheese Frosting: Beat butter & cream cheese at medium speed until creamy. Add powdered sugar and vanilla; beat until smooth. Add more sugar, if needed, to reach desired consistency.
When layers are completely cool, spread with cream cheese frosting.

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Honey Bun Coffee Cake – Nance and Robyn make the same recipe

Posted on May 14, 2013 by admin

Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Honey Bun Coffee Cake. Printable recipe can be found at the bottom of this post. The original recipe can be found over at My Homemade Life

Robyn’s Take:

This week’s recipe was my choice. I’d tell you how I stumbled across the recipe, but I haven’t got a clue. Pinterest, maybe? Yeah, okay, let’s say Pinterest. Why not?

You know those honey buns you can buy in your local convenience store or by the box at the grocery store? This cake was reported to taste just like them only, you know, bigger and not wrapped in cellophane. I like those honey buns – I mean, I’m not addicted, but I like ’em every now and then – so this recipe caught my eye. And it’s a relatively easy recipe too, and you KNOW how much I like simplicity in my recipes.

For the cake part of this recipe, you need:

Yellow cake mix, sour cream, vegetable oil, eggs, brown sugar, and cinnamon.

Throw your cake mix, sour cream, vegetable oil and eggs in a big ol’ bowl.

Stir everything together ’til it’s well combined.

Pour half the batter into a greased 9×13 pan (I use Baker’s Joy spray because it’s so convenient and also I like to add as many chemicals into my recipes as possible. SOMETHING’S GOTTA KILL ME.)

Combine your brown sugar and cinnamon in a smallish bowl.

Sprinkle the brown sugar and cinnamon over the batter in the pan. Spread it evenly…ish. Look, nobody’s perfect. Spread it the best you can, dummy. God knows that if I was ever able to sprinkle ANYthing evenly EVER, the world would screech to a halt and then crack open.

Spread the rest of the cake batter over the top of the brown sugar and cinnamon mixture.

If you’re me, you’re muttering lots of profanity because the damn sugar/cinnamon shit is clinging to the batter that you’re desperately trying to spread over the top of it, and it looks like hell, but this is NOT a pretty cake and who are you trying to impress, anyway?

Take a knife and drag it through the batter and cinnamon sugar in random swirly patterns. Look, do whatever you want. You can see that I did long swirly patterns because I had no real idea of what I was doing. It worked out fine. IT DID.

Now throw the pan in the oven, and clean up your kitchen. When you’re done cleaning, you might have a moment to veg out in front of your computer before you have to make your glaze.

Your glaze needs to be done and ready to pour by the time the cake comes out of the oven. Luckily, it’s easy to make.

Glaze ingredients:

Confectioner’s sugar, rum UM I MEAN VANILLA EXTRACT, and milk.

Stir your sugar, vanilla, and milk together. I used my 4-cup measuring cup to make it easier to dump over the cake. AM BRILLIANT.

Looks like glue.

Oh look! Cake’s done!

Dump the glaze over the hothothot cake and then spread evenly..ish. Look, just do the best you can. No one’s judging you except your mother, your sister, your kindergarten grade teacher (“I knew that child was going to come to no good when she couldn’t color inside the lines”) and Amanda.

Mmmm, glue cake.

Let it cool for at least 15 minutes or, if you’re me, more like an hour. What? I had other stuff to do. Those kittens aren’t going to snorgle themselves.

Here it is after an hour with the glaze all cooled and crackly.

And… the verdict? Well, I kinda made this face.

Yep. I didn’t care for this at ALL. Not one bit did I care for it. In fact, I didn’t even eat one whole piece, and excuse me – there’s something WRONG if I can’t even finish one piece of a cake. It was a really really heavy cake and it was not to my liking at all.

Fred also didn’t care for it.

The chickens, however, gave it 73 beaks up and demolished it in 10 seconds flat. George and Gracie each got a small piece, and I got the feeling they ate it just to be polite.

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Nance’s Take:

I was all excited when I saw that this recipe had a cake mix for the main ingredient because, “Hey, I have a cake mix in the cupboard!” But then I started thinking about how many recipes I’ve bombed over the years and I really didn’t want to use my magic butter cake mix on what could possibly end up in the garbage. So I did the smart thing and grabbed a cheap cake mix for this recipe and saved the butter one for another time. What? I like butter. And rumor has it that it’s better for you than margarine. But that’s just this week. Who the hell knows what will be good/bad for you next week?

Way back in 2008 Robyn was taking pictures of food that she made. She was a food blogger before it was a thing!

Somebody knows that they got busted for being ridiculous and they obviously don’t care. Hee!

I bought a kitchen scale! And thankfully it goes back to zero after you put your bowl on it so you don’t have to do any math! And it does that whole bullshit thing about noting the differences in fluids/solids/density/boring/WTFEVAH that Rick and I always fight about. It just may save my marriage, yo.

Please Note: A perfect eight ounces brought to you by She Who Knows Her Way Around a Scale. Fucking scales. I have never met a scale that I liked.

Action shot!

I read the part about lumps right when I was using the mixer. Oops! So I ran the mixer a little more just to mix the eggs in properly and then I quit. So what I’m trying to say here is that when the recipe said that it might be lumpy, I let it be lumpy.

I carried the lumpy theme over into the brown sugar/cinnamon mixture too. Don’t do what I do. I’m going to just go ahead and blame Shirley (aka: mom) because she had just come home from a church rummage sale and plopped this down on the counter…

This 13-year-old cookbook is going on the shelf with the other cookbooks that I haven’t tried anything from yet. She knows that we’re wanting to get beyond the one entry per week that we do. But damn, finding a recipe, buying the groceries, making the recipe, taking the pictures and then writing about it is harrrd. I need a secretary.

As you can see, I had a time of it when I tried to make the swirls. This is also why I never make marble cake.

The icing. That’s a whole lotta powdered sugar in there. Of course I tasted it and HOLY SWEETNESS, BATMAN! I always thought I was a sweet eater and that’s why I am such a fat-fatty. But I’m pretty sure that I’m more of a fat eater than a sweet eater. Especially after this recipe.

Action shot of the icing going on the cake. I work magic with my descriptions, huh? Shut-up.

You know how sometimes you can really like something, but ruin it for yourself if you eat too much of it? Yeah. This was a ridiculous amount of icing for a so-called Honeybun anything.

I tried a piece with the least amount of icing and eh, it was okay. An easier delivery method would be if you just opened your mouth and poured in 1 cup each of powdered and brown sugar mixed with 1 teaspoon of cinnamon. It was just TOO MUCH. You could easily halve both the cinnamon “swirl” and the icing parts of the recipe and have a really great coffee cake. But this was a case of major over-kill. Everyone in my house agreed that it was ridiculously sweet so we’re going to pass and I’m glad I didn’t use my butter cake mix!

About those pictures of Robyn…You’re welcome.

Honey Bun Coffee Cake - Nance and Robyn make the same recipe

Prep time

10 mins

Cook time

40 mins

Total time

50 mins

: Dessert, Breakfast, Snack

Cuisine: Guamanian

Serves: 12

Ingredients

Cake:
1 box yellow cake mix of your choice
8 ounce sour cream (Robyn used reduced-fat because she's counting calories, bwahaha)
4 eggs
¾ c. vegetable oil
Cake filling:
1 c brown sugar
1 T ground cinnamon
Glaze:
2 c. confectioner's sugar
4 T milk
1 T vanilla

Instructions

In a large bowl, combine cake mix, sour cream, eggs, and vegetable oil. Stir together until well combined (some lumps are okay. You're never going to get all those lumps out!)
Pour half the batter into a greased pan.
Combine brown sugar and cinnamon in a medium bowl. Sprinkle evenly(ish) over the batter.
Spread the rest of the batter over the top of the cinnamon sugar. It'll look like crap; that's okay. No one's judging you except Amanda.
Take a butter knife and swirl it through the batter from one end to the other.
Bake for 40 minutes at 325ºF, check with a toothpick for doneness (if the toothpick comes out clean, the cake is done.)
When the cake is just about done cooking, mix your glaze (so that it'll be ready when the cake comes out of the oven). Stir together confectioner's sugar, milk and vanilla with a small whisk or fork to get all the lumps out.
As soon as the cake comes out of the oven, pour the glaze over the top and spread it evenly.
Let cool 15 minutes (or more) before serving.

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Pink Lemonade Cupcakes – Nance and Robyn make the same recipe

Posted on April 17, 2013 by Robyn

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Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Pink Lemonade Cupcakes, found over at Your Home Based Mom. Printable recipe can be found at the bottom of this post.

Robyn’s Take:

This week’s recipe was my choice, and I found it by Googling around for Paula Deen’s pink lemonade buttercream frosting, after one of you commenters mentioned the idea in a comment. I’d point y’all to it and thank the commenter, but I’ll be damned if I can remember who it was. (Okay, I just went and searched. It was Melanie. Take a bow, Melanie!)

A doctored-up cake mix and pink lemonade frosting. You KNOW I was on board for that!

Your cake ingredients:

White cake mix, the things you need to make the cake according to the directions on the box (in this case, vegetable oil and eggs – water was required, too, but I didn’t bother to take a picture of that. If you don’t know what water is, you’ve got bigger problems than we can help with.), lemon zest, pink lemonade mix, and ~~Bacardi Rum~~ vanilla.

Seriously. Who the fuck are they trying to kid? Eating raw cake batter is your reward for making a cake! Kiss my ass, Betty Crocker (Nance, add them to the list of companies that will never sponsor us now!)

Mix the cake, toss in lemon zest (I used fresh lemon zest because I’m a fancy bitch like that. You could probably use the dried stuff you can buy in the store if you are not so fancy as me.), vanilla, powdered drink mix. (By the way, that Country Time Pink Lemonade was the ONLY kind of pink lemonade that wasn’t using artificial sweeteners, which is why I bought that huge-ass container when I only needed a little of the powder.)

This, right here, is the point where I decided to deviate from the recipe. I was pouring batter into the cupcake liners that lined the cups of my muffin tin, and I remembered how much I REALLY FUCKING HATE peeling those liners off the cupcakes, and so I decided “Oh, to hell with this shit. I’m making a cake instead.”

So I greased my 9×13 cake pan, dumped in the batter, and stuck it in the oven.

I AM SUCH A REBEL.

Uh oh.

This is what a cake pan with raw batter in it looks like. In case you were wondering.

And the cake, done. Well, probably a little overdone.

I let the cake cool for a few hours, and then made the frosting. I should add here that I made this cake on the day that we had guys tromping in and out of the house all day long, replacing our air conditioning unit thingy. The thing I hate about having work done in the house is that I feel like I can’t DO anything in case they need a question answered (they didn’t need ANY questions answered), so I was very distracted. And yet, I took the following super-gorgeous and professional-looking picture of the frosting ingredients. Try not to feel too bad about your own picture-taking abilities.

Thawed frozen lemonade concentrate, powdered sugar, softened butter, ~~Bacardi Rum~~ vanilla.

Beat your butter ’til it’s creamy.

Add your powdered sugar, 1/2 cup at a time until you get annoyed and just throw the rest of it in there and sugar goes everywhere.

Add vanilla and thawed pink lemonade concentrate until it’s the consistency you want.

Frost your cake.

What you cannot tell from this picture is that the frosting was a very pretty, very light pink.

And the verdict? Fred thought it was AWEsome. He thought it was so awesome that at the end of the weekend, instead of feeding the leftovers to the chickens, like we usually do, he wrapped it in tin foil and stuck it in the freezer. Can you DO that with cake, frosted with buttercream frosting? Hell if I know; I guess we’ll find out next weekend.

I, on the other hand, was pretty meh about it. I don’t think it was the fault of the recipe, I think I just wasn’t in the mood for cake and buttercream frosting. (I know, right? CAN there be such a thing as not being in the mood for cake and buttercream frosting?! Apparently so.)

At this point, I have no plans to make it again unless Fred specifically requests it.

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Nance’s take:

This is Rick and Robyn in a popular cupcake shop back in 2008. Please note the serious cheesin’ that happens with these two when there are cameras present. Good Lord. Also, the amount of freaking cupcakes that were purchased that day!

I love cupcakes, but I stick with white, chocolate or yellow. Don’t be messing around and adding shit. I might break down and have a red velvet one, but I usually always regret it. On the day this photo was taken I distinctly remember having a couple margarita flavored cupcakes (ew) in the box. And I remember Robyn liking them. What a weirdo.

So I wasn’t surprised when she decided to go pink lemonade on me with this recipe, but I did roll my eyes really hard. I grumbled and bitched about how awful it was going to taste and put everything about making them off until the last minute. Maybe we should just try to find a recipe for the most perfect vanilla cupcake, eh?

Shirley was bound and determined to help me get these damn cupcakes done and I’m pretty sure that it was just so she wouldn’t have to listen to me bitch about it anymore. I was howling when I found out that my 72-year-old mom had no idea what lemon zest was. Yes, this is my mother and the woman who was supposed to have taught me how to cook. To say she was having difficulty is an understatement and I sure did hold my breath when she grabbed that paring knife to get the zest off that micro-planer. Especially when she dropped it and almost impaled poor Sadie. The very worst part? I’m pretty sure we have used lemon zest in other recipes on here. Is my mother having a moment?

My first action shot of the entry! Whee!

Cake batter with pink lemonade mix and lemon zest (which sorta kinda looks like cumin because I am that much of a great photographer). Who has an expensive camera and still doesn’t know how to use it?

After I mixed it up I wasn’t impressed with how it looked so I decided to add some gel food coloring. Pretty, huh?

Blahblahblah, right? I decided to switch things up after I made the first round of cupcakes so I added blueberries (tossed in flour) to the last of the cupcake batter before I tossed it in the oven. Everybody knows that blueberries and lemon go great together. Right, Phaedra?

This is me making the frosting and forgetting to take a picture until the last minute. Ugh!

I decided to use a plastic storage bag instead of a pastry bag so I could just throw it away when I was done.

Big Mistake. After this happened I remembered that I tried this before and the plastic storage bag didn’t hold up. I’m a clumsy ox on a good day so you can just imagine the freaking mess I had going on here. I’m also a stupid ox for doing this before and not learning my lesson.

Man down!

Of course it had to have been one that was already frosted.

I tried to make my cupcakes as pretty as the ones that lady had on her page, but get real. It’s a cupcake and I couldn’t be bothered because it felt too much like crafting to me.

The most shocking thing? Everybody liked these cupcakes! They liked the normal ones and they liked the ones that I put blueberries in. The recipe is definitely a winner in this house. Do I think I’ll make them again? Maybe someday if I am completely over normal cupcakes. But I just don’t know if it’s worth the hassle of tracking down pink lemonade mix and lemonade concentrate. Eh, I guess I’m on the fence about it. They’re good. Not great. I would probably just stick with chocolate, white or yellow.

Besides, look what it did to poor Felina!

Pink Lemonade Cupcakes - Nance and Robyn make the same recipe

Prep time

15 mins

Cook time

30 mins

Total time

45 mins

: Dessert, Snack

Cuisine: Zimbabwe-an

Serves: 12

Ingredients

Cake:
1 Box of white cake mix + whatever ingredients the box calls for (usually eggs, oil, water)
1 tsp lemon zest (use fresh if you're fancy; the dried stuff from the grocery store if you're not)
2 tsp vanilla extract
3 Tbsp sweetened pink lemonade drink powder (I'd avoid the stuff with artificial sweetener, but you do what's in your heart)
Frosting:
1 lb. powdered sugar
3-5 Tbsp frozen pink lemonade concentrate, melted
1 tsp vanilla
½ C softened butter

Instructions

Make your cake:
Preheat the oven according to the instructions on the box.
If you're making cupcakes, line your muffin tin with cupcake liners. If you're making a cake, spray your cake pan with Baker's Joy or Pam or whatever cheap knockoff you use. NO JUDGEMENT HERE.
Mix cake batter following the instructions on the back of the box; add in lemon zest, vanilla, and pink lemonade powder. Bake according to the instructions on the box.
Cool.
Make your frosting:
Beat the softened butter on med-high speed until it's pale and creamy; about 2 - 3 minutes.
Reduce speed and add powdered sugar ½ cup at a time. Make sure the powdered sugar is well incorporated before you add the next ½ cup of sugar. When all the sugar has been added, turn the speed to high.
Add vanilla and then melted pink lemonade concentrate until you've reached your desired consistency.
Beat until the frosting is smooth.

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Robyn & Nance try the same recipe – Lemon Bars

Posted on February 6, 2012 by admin

Every Monday, we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was from Christy Jordan’s book Southern Plate. (She has a web site of the same name, here.)

Robyn’s take:

Nance got to pick this week’s recipe. We both own Christy Jordan’s cookbook, but it wasn’t ’til we started this site that I made anything from it. Actually, even though Christy is local to me it wasn’t until my friend Katherine pointed me to Christy’s site and specifically the Butterfinger Cake recipe a couple of years ago that I even knew who she was. Now that I’ve started using her cookbook, I want to make EVERYTHING from it!

So Nance chose this week’s recipe and I was ALL about making lemon bars. I love all things lemon and I knew I’d love these.

Your ingredients:

Don’t you like my super-awesome way of labeling my confectioner’s sugar? I am klassy with a capital K. Also, I like how the no-name brand of butter just says “BUTTER” on it, that cracks me up for some reason.

Anyway, these are the ingredients for the crust. As you can see, super simple. Confectioner’s sugar, all-purpose flour, and softened butter (you can use margarine if you want. I don’t know why you would, but I’m not here to judge.)

Apparently I didn’t get a picture of the part where you sift together the flour and sugar and then cut in the butter. It went about as you’d expect. I used a pastry blender. It was amazing.

Then you pat the dough into the bottom of a 9×13-inch dish. Christy didn’t say anything about greasing the dish, but the idea of not greasing the dish made me nervous, so I used the butter wrappers to butter the bottom and sides of the dish. Could I say “dish” any more often there? Dishdishdishdishdiiiiiiiiiiiish.

Put your crust in the oven to bake for about 25 minutes or until it’s lightly browned. Like such:

These are some fabulous pictures this week, aren’t they? Hey, I never claimed to be a food photographer. I tried offering the crust some catnip, but it refused to roll around and look cute.

Now, warning: I am a dumbass and I skim when I read recipes. So I missed the part where you’re supposed to let the crust cool. I didn’t let it cool at ALL, and in fact I made the filling while the crust was cooking and dumped it right on the hot crust. It turned out okay, but perhaps if I paid attention to what I was supposed to be doing, it would have been BETTER.

Here are the filling ingredients:

Eggs (from our very own chickens), granulated sugar, lemon juice, all-purpose flour, baking powder, and confectioner’s sugar. You mix it all up (except for the confectioner’s sugar, which is for sprinkling on the top) and then you yell for your husband to come dump it over the crust so you can get a picture of it.

Then stick the whole shebang in the oven and bake it for 15 minutes or until slightly browned and set. Now, my bars weren’t set at 15 minutes, it took another 3 minutes in the oven. Pro (HA HA HA) tip: if the filling is still jiggly, give it a few more minutes.

Perhaps a little more brown around the edge than it should be? But still, they turned out really really good. Fred and I each had a small piece once the bars were cool and they were SO GOOD. They were even better the next day – I’m not sure if that’s because sitting made the flavors blend better or just because we were hungrier the next day.

The verdict? These were oh so good. Perfectly lemony, but not overwhelmingly so. I am definitely going to make these again and I think you should too!

******************************************************************************************************************

Nance’s side:

It was my turn to pick the recipe and, once again, I went for The Fattening. Y’all (yunz – shout out Western Pa!) should just get used to it. I’m sure that Robyn will take care of all that healthy stuff. Something tells me that I’m going to see zucchini and okra in my future. Barf.

I thought the Lemon bars would be good because Holy Two Sticks of Butter Batman! I have never had lemon bars, but rumor has it that it’s pretty popular in the south (per the husband). I figure I like butter and I like lemonade. How bad can it be, right? And I noticed that the ingredient list wasn’t full of freaky stuff that I didn’t recognize. Plus, I have tried a few other recipes in Christy’s cookbook and they all turned out excellent. Can you see where this is going? Oh, just wait. It’s going to get ugly up in here.

It cracks my shit up that Robyn and I both took a picture of the butter. Please note that the placement of my butter was well thought out (unlike someone who just chunked it down on their counter and snapped away, ahem). Yes, I had to open up a new package of butter and that’s why they don’t look the same. I’m wishing now that I had taken the extra time to do that. And if you believe that shit I have some beautiful lemon bars for you to try.

Since Robyn and I are both doing the same recipe (and reviewing it) I follow the directions exactly. I even busted out the SIFTER for this bitch because Christy said that’s what I was supposed to do and I did it. Oh look! Canisters that don’t have masking tape labels. I guess I’m just not as cool as Robyn. And I don’t see anything about where Robyn SIFTED her stuff. Maybe she couldn’t be bothered, hmm?

I cut the butter into the flour until I couldn’t stand it anymore. And this is what it looked like when I got ready to press it into the pan. You like that purple casserole dish? Get used to it because I use that thing a lot.

Me and my man hands pressing that mess into the pan. I thought about making it pretty and then I woke the fuck up and realized that there is no hope. And no, I didn’t grease my pan because hello, two sticks of butter!

Even Felina (the ridiculous chihuahua) was concerned about how this situation was going to turn out.

It didn’t turn out bad at all. I took this picture so everyone could see what “lightly browned” meant. Or at least my version of it anyway.

This is where I think the situation took a serious turn for the worse. I had Rick beat the eggs and he went to town. And I let him because I was having fun snapping pictures of that it.

See, action shots! What? We were bored.

I even sifted the flour and baking powder. I did what I was supposed to do, dammit! If this was Robyn she would have typed damnit because she’s so perfect.

And yeah, we were really into catching it while it was happening. Get a life, Nance & Rick!

Looks good, no?

Set the timer. Did everything just like the book said. And guess how it turned out. Well, let me show you…

How do you say FAIL?

I managed to get 3 pieces out and on a plate (dug from the center, gah!) and the shit was oozing everywhere.

I was thoroughly disgusted and as I was walking out the door to go grocery shopping my mother asked me what she should do with them. “Throw them in the garbage for chrissakes!”

And then I went to the store and saw this. How rude!

I am still trying to figure out where I went wrong. And no, there isn’t anything wrong with our stove. The only thing I could come up with is the over-beating (whisking, whee!) of the eggs. If anybody has a clue, feel free to let me know in the comment section. For once, this bitch needs to buy her own vowel. Sigh.

PS: Even though I screwed it up (oh, trust me, I know it was something I did) I would definitely recommend this recipe based on how Robyn’s turned out. I’m going to have to try this again (once y’all tell me where I messed up).

Robyn & Nance try the same recipe - Lemon Bars

Prep time

10 mins

Cook time

50 mins

Total time

1 hour

Original Source/Author: Christy Jordan

: Dessert, Snack

Serves: 12

Ingredients

CRUST:
2 c. all-purpose flour
½ c confectioner's sugar
1 c. (2 sticks) butter or margarine, softened
FILLING:
4 eggs, beaten
2 c. granulated sugar
⅓ c. lemon juice
½ c. all-purpose flour
½ tsp baking powder
¼ c. confectioner's sugar

Instructions

Preheat the oven to 350ºF.
Sift together the flour and confectioner's sugar into a large bowl. Cut in the butter until the mixture sticks together.
Press into a 9x13-inch dish. Bake for 25 minutes, or until lightly browned. Remove from the oven to cool (leave the oven on.)
LET THE CRUST COOL, STUPID. DON'T BE LIKE ROBYN.
While the crust is cooling (DON'T FORGET TO LET THE CRUST COOL), make the filling. In a large bowl, combine the beaten eggs, granulated sugar, and lemon juice.
In a separate bowl, sift the flour and baking powder; stir into the egg mixture.
Pour over the (COOLED) baked crust and bake for 15 minutes or until slightly browned and set. Remove from the oven, cool, and sprinkle with confectioner's sugar. Cut into bars.

Notes

Did I mention that you're supposed to let the crust cool before you add the filling? DO IT.

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