Crockpot Mongolian Beef – Nance and Robyn make the same recipe

Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Crock Pot Mongolian Beef. Printable recipe can be found at the bottom of this post.  The original recipe can be found over at Very Culinary.

Robyn’s Take:

This week’s recipe was my choice. And by “my choice” what I mean is that I sent Fred a bunch of links that I’d bookmarked and told him to choose one. This is the one he chose, so if it turns out Nance’s family didn’t like it, it’s all Fred’s fault. (If it turns out they did, I get all the credit, of course.)

Your ingredients:

DCEP (2)

It was while I was assembling the ingredients for this picture that I began swearing. I am TELLING you – am I EVER going to learn to read through the ingredients before I decide on a recipe? Would that be too much to ask? Because apparently it WOULD. Ingredients I didn’t have on hand and had to find substitutes for: white wine (I used chicken broth), white wine vinegar (I used red wine vinegar), and molasses (I used honey.)

What I’m saying is that I’m apparently one of those assholes who reviews a recipe by saying “I didn’t remotely make this recipe the way I was supposed to, and it didn’t come out the way it was supposed to, and IT IS ALL THE RECIPE’S FAULT.”

So your ingredients, basically: meat, cornstarch, soy sauce, and a bunch of other shit I’m not going to list here, because that’s what the recipe is for, and I’m too lazy to type it all out.

DCEP (3) DCEP (4)

Toss your meat with the cornstarch. I started out with my meat in a smaller container, but it didn’t allow for much meat movement, so I switched to a larger container, put the lid on it, and shook it all about. Thus dirtying two containers instead of one, is what I’m saying. Because I can’t get enough of DOING THE GODDAMNED DISHES. I live for it!

DCEP (5)

Combine all the other non-meat, non-cornstarch ingredients in the crock pot and whisk them together.

DCEP (6)

Put your meat in the crock pot, and stir it all together. Turn that shit on low and ignore it for 4 hours.

While you’re waiting, you could probably do all the goddamned dishes.

DCEP (1)

“Don’t go down there. She’s doing dishes again.”

“AGAIN? How many dishes does she USE in a day?”

“She says it’s our fault. I didn’t tell her we’d eat off the floor if she’d let us and then she wouldn’t have to wash dishes. She didn’t seem like she’d be receptive to hearing that just now.”

“Humans are dumbasses.”

When it’s done, serve it over white rice (though I suspect brown rice would be good, too. If you’re into that sort of thing.)

DCEP (7)

The verdict? You know, it was really pretty good – not GREAT, but certainly GOOD – the night I made it. The leftovers, however, weren’t so good. I don’t know. It was good but not so good that I’m inclined to make it again. How’s that for noncommittal and useless? I wasn’t a big fan, but YOU might be!


Have a recipe you want us to make? Check out this page (there’s also a link to that page up there under the banner) and follow the instructions to submit a recipe!


Nance’s Take:

I pretty much never object to Robyn’s choices for DCEP recipes because the object of this site (besides cursing) was to force us to try new things. But I was ready to kill her when I printed out this recipe and actually read the ingredient list.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

Note: This motherfucking recipe rode in my purse for way too long.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

A visual of the things needed for this recipe that I did not have in my house. To say I was annoyed is an understatement.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

We’re teetotalers around here so I knew when I went to the liquor store* that I wanted to buy the cheapest white wine they had. Does Mad-Dog 20/20 come in a white? Of course we were jumped by a saleswoman from hell and I was ready to throttle Robyn when this dumb bitch decided to school me on cooking with wine. Really? Like I no idea that people actually cook with wine! Rick could do nothing but half-grin, half-grimace at me while I half-rolled my eyes and pointed to the cheapest thing on the shelf. Hence our four-pack of tiny pinot grigio bottles!

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

The package said Top Round London Broil. I have no idea if $3.99/lb is a good price or not.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

This is everything you need to make this recipe. I sincerely think the original recipe was the result of someone just dumping everything they found in their cupboards into the pot and hoping for a miracle.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

Some people can take a picture of themselves and look normal. And some people look like squinty, mouth-breathing simpletons. Guess which category I’m in. Ack! I was trying to show how big this knife is that Rick bought at a yard sale many years ago. It’s huge and fabulous.  You should also be jealous of my bedazzled shirt.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

Cuts right through it like butter. Here’s where I confess that I was going to use an electric knife because I don’t know what the hell I’m doing when it comes to cutting meat. This is the very first time I have ever used this big knife and we have had it for years.  I should be ashamed about this fact, but see above bedazzled shirt.  I have no pride.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

This picture is kinda gross if you think about it too much.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

I put Shirley (aka:mom) to work getting the meat coated with corn starch.  And I took this picture to prove that I don’t lie when I say Shirley likes to wear her tube-tops with sweatpants. I drew the red-line to show where the tube-top ends and the sweatpants begin. I can’t figure out how she got the colors to match up like that. It’s amazing and horrifying all at the same time.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

I started measuring and dumping everything into the crockpot. If you don’t mind measuring and dumping a LOT of things, you’ll find this recipe pretty easy. If you do mind, you’re shit out of luck because there are a lot of things to get out, measure, and return to their proper place. I’m really just saying that this could be considered a work-out depending on the size of your kitchen and how much you swing your arms.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

I’m getting ready to whisk all that crap together.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

This is the only action shot I took.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

This is the point where I started to think about the pizza we were going to have to order for dinner. I really didn’t have much hope for this mess. At all.

Crockpot Mongolian Beef

It was delicious!  Great flavor, tender meat and just enough heat to make it interesting.  Every single person in the house (including the teenager) loved it so I know we’ll be having it again.

Robyn picked a winner!

*Pennsylvania is really behind the times when it comes to selling wine in grocery stores.  

Crockpot Mongolian Beef - Nance and Robyn make the same recipe
Prep time
Cook time
Total time
: Entree
Cuisine: Crocklandian
Serves: 4
  • 1½ pound flank steak or ball tip steak (if you can't find either of those, I'd give London Broil a try)
  • ¼ c cornstarch
  • ½ c soy sauce (low sodium or gluten-free)
  • ¼ c white wine (you can substitute chicken broth)
  • ¼ c cooking sherry
  • ½ T white wine vinegar (or red wine vinegar if you don't have white wine vinegar on hand)
  • 1 tsp sesame oil
  • 1 tsp molasses (or honey!)
  • 1 tsp dried ginger
  • 1 tsp dried onion
  • ¼ tsp black pepper
  • ½ tsp red chili flakes
  • 3 T brown sugar
  • ½ T peanut butter
  • 3 cloves minced garlic
  • 4 scallions, sliced thin
  1. Slice the meat thinly and coat with cornstarch - discard any excess cornstarch.
  2. Put all the liquids, spices, peanut butter, garlic and scallions into the crock pot and whisk together. Add meat and stir to coat.
  3. Cover and cook on low for 4 hours. Serve over white or brown rice.

Comments now closed: Spammers suck.


Crockpot Mongolian Beef – Nance and Robyn make the same recipe — 48 Comments

  1. I hope this satisfies Amanda. It has more damn ingredients than Robyn has kittens. Amanda doesn’t think anything is a real recipe unless it has at least 15 ingredients. Amanda? Any comment?

    • I think Amanda is prostrate upon her chaise lounge clutching her pearls because she can’t fathom a world where shaking meat about (especially in a large container) is acceptable cooking behavior.

      Or not. I do love crockpotting so I may give this a try minus the soy sauce as that’s verbotin in my diet.

      Nance, here in Oregon we can buy wine in the grocery store but hard liquor must be purchased in a State liquor store, and up until a few years ago they weren’t open on Sundays!

      • There is a specific store here (Giant Eagle) that has been somewhat “allowed” to sell beer, but it’s all up in the air. I don’t even know if our liquor stores our open on Sundays – I think that they’re not. I do know that only bars that serve food are allowed to be open on Sundays. Pennsylvania is just too full of motherfucking rules and I can’t keep anything straight. Grr!

    • Amanda thinks crock pots are for amateurs and lazy mothers who should readjust their priorities in order spend the bulk of their days preparing the perfect nine course meal for their growing angels.

      I, however, think crock pot recipes are AWESOME! (And I think my local Kroger sells that teeny tiny bottle of wine in singles for a dollar… SCORE!)

      • OMG, you are so spot on with that Amanda comment. I can’t even imagine a 9 course meal. Salad, meat, starch, vegetable and dessert is all I am capable of coming up with. Oh, wait. Dinner rolls. LOL

    • Tawnya, I would be very surprised if this recipe would make Amanda happy. Although there are many ingredients, there are no special cooking techniques involved. But I loved your comment about the recipe having more ingredients than Robyn has kittens. Hee!

      • I feel sure that Amanda may use a crock-pot when the chef is off and she has a spa appointment even though she probably thinks that’s “cheating” or “slumming”. I think that using a crock-pot could be considered a domestic crisis in Amanda’s circle of DAR acquaintances.

  2. Oh, the famous Crocklandian cuisine! I remember well my first trip to the northern region of Crockland, such beautiful vistas….

    Sorry, I couldn’t help myself! Robyn, you are too funny! This sounds really good, my husband loves Mongolian beef, so I will definitely give this a try.

    • I shall have to remember, when answering that question, that my favorite ethnic cuisine is not Mexican… it’s Crocklandian. Seriously, I own two of them because I use them so much. Especially in the winter, I’m known for cooking with the crockpot several times a week.

      • Crocklandia – It’s a hard trip to make, but I absolutely love it when I get there. I intend to visit it more, too! I like busting up with a real meal every once in a while, but I hate all the effort in the kitchen. This is why I cannot for the life of me understand how Amanda enjoys Timesuckington.

      • The point is that the food elitist goes to a fast food place just like those she mocks. She just knows that *if* she ever got to cooking she would be way better at it than the finest chef.

        Those who actually have to whip up those three daily meals over years have to be a bit more realistic.

    • I didn’t taste the slightest bit of peanut butter, so I don’t honestly know why it’s in there (but I am not a food scientist, so I’m sure there’s a good reason!)

      • I couldn’t taste it either. I really do think the OP just threw everything she had into a pot and prayed for a miracle.

        But Robyn, shit…you didn’t even come CLOSE to the actual recipe! You’re going to have to bust-up with the ALKY-HAUL (meaning quit sucking it all down and actually use it for cooking once in a while, ya drunkard!) and try this recipe for real!

  3. Questions and thoughts on this entry:
    1. Doesn’t Nance hate soy sauce?
    2. Meat movement – hahahahaha!
    3. Is Shirley aware Nance took a photo of her tube top/sweatpants ensemble?

      • It’s really good! I don’t think I’ll use another recipe again because that shit was SIMPLE and it actually came out like biscuits! I’m all about less time in the kitchen as long as it tastes good so it was a total win for me!

    • 1. I do not enjoy The Soy Sauce. Around here, when I fry green beans (yes, you read that right – WE FRY THEM LIKE FATTIES) they like it with soy sauce. I prefer mine fried with worcestershire sauce. But…If the soy sauce is mixed in with a bunch of other stuff – I don’t mind it because it’s not that strong.
      2. My meat didn’t move as much as it was just thrown about willy-nilly. Ahem.
      3. Yes, Shirley was aware of the tube-top photography and she DID NOT CARE because that’s how she rolls. My mother is very friendly with a lot of people, but you know you’re “family” if she wears the tube-top in front of you. Regan and Robyn are FAMILY. Unfortunately for them. Ha!

      • My family fries string beans too but we use butter and then we sprinkle bread crumbs on them as they are cooking.. I always assumed it was a PA Dutch/Amish thing my Mom got from her mother and former Amish Grandmother.

      • Green beans fried with worcestershire sauce?

        This is relevant to my interests. Please to be posting the instructions for this.


        A fan of the green beans AND of the worcestershire sauce.

  4. Woot! Loving the crockpot recipes this way too fucking hot summer!

    Hey Nance, I am sad to report that this is still all supermodel thin on my android tablet running chrome (although it’s fine on my PC). If Monsieur Richard has a chance to take a look, I would be hella grateful.

    • Very soon – possibly as soon as this weekend – we’ll be going to a more mobile-friendly theme that will (we hope!) solve that issue. Fingers crossed!

      • Yes, Robyn agreed to take control of this goddamn site and rope it back into shape. Yay! Thanks to all of you who stuck with my stupidity while I tried to figure things out in between constant interruptions and general life chaos. It took me over a year to finally admit that I just cannot do it and beg Robyn for help.

        I wanna be her when I grow up. That bitch can do anything (even with her drinking problem, hee!). And I’m very lucky to call her my friend. Even if she doesn’t pay attention enough to know that I do not like soy sauce. 😉

  5. That looks good!! I’ll have to buy some wine which will be a major pain in the ass I’m sure. Or maybe I’ll just borrow some from the neighbours. The way they carry on it would seem they have enough to share.

  6. This looks interesting to me. I need to use the crockpot to beat this damn heat.

  7. I pulled two all-nighters making monkey bread this week (where part of the process is tossing raw biscuit pieces into a bag of sugar and cinnamon and shaking them about until they are coated) and while I was doing this in the small, wee hours, I remembered Robyn’s “meat movement” comment and was consumed with the giggles while jiggling my biscuit bits about!

  8. The redesign is fabulous!! Thank you for getting rid of the 3 columns. (You did it just for me, I know!!)

  9. Mr. POSSLQ made this tonight and it is AWESOME!

    It does not taste of peanut butter, the ginger gives it just a little “bite” and served with a sweet white wine, it was magnificent!