Every week we’ll post a recipe that we both made. This week’s recipe was Crockpot Beans & Hot Dogs, found over at SouthernFood.About.com. Printable recipe can be found at the bottom of this post.
Readers, forgive me for I am an asshole. This week’s recipe was chosen by me – and by “me”, I mean that I said “Oh, just go pick something for us to make!” to Fred, and he chose this one, and I gave it a cursory glance before sending it off to Nance and getting the okay. When the day came for me to make the recipe, I gathered my baked beans and my hot dogs, and then I really read the recipe.
And I said “Um, what? Is this a recipe that adds a weird sauce to a can of beans that are already plenty saucy? Fuck that.” (Note: Fred does not like molasses, AT ALL, so the fact that he chose this recipe means that he also did not read it through. He was just placating me, as he is wont to do.)
So here’s what I used:
Hot dogs, baked beans, onion. No weird molasses-y sauce. Just the basics. (Please note that the recipe calls for cans of “pork and beans”, but I have no idea if that’s the same thing as baked beans, or another thing entirely and also I don’t honestly care.)
Toss a can of baked beans in the crock pot, add half your package of hot dogs, sliced, and then half your onion, also sliced. Another can of baked beans, the rest of the hot dogs and onion, and top with the last can of baked beans.
Bake on low for 6 – 8 hours. Eat.
Looks like shit, tastes great. What I ended up making is exactly the recipe that I grew up eating, only made in a crock pot instead of an oven.
I can’t rate the original recipe, but my version was damn tasty and I give it two thumbs up. Also, Fred has lost recipe-choosing privileges.
(Sorry, no kitten pics this week. I’ll do better next week, PROMISE.)
When Robyn sent this recipe my way I laughed my ass off because I figured she has never heard of what this family calls poor people food. I grew up on this shit and I’m sure there are a lot more people out there that have grown up eating it too. Beans & Wieners, FTW!
I decided to make it the way my family does because I was not about to put baked beans in a crockpot for 6 to 8 hours. That’s fucking ridiculous! They’re baked beans for chrissakes. Some people eat them cold straight from the can! I can just imagine my entire family sitting down to a meal that was cooked in a crockpot all day and seeing their faces when I dished out baked beans and wieners. Bwahaha. No.
So I’m going to make the original recipe (seen below), but I’m only going to take about 15 minutes to do it (start to finish). Because using 6 to 8 hours to heat up food that has already been cooked is just dumb.
Did someone ask for a hot dog?
I got your hot dog right here.
Ten points to whoever gets Felina’s celebrity impersonation. Hint: Sherry Lewis.
Okay, I’m done goofing off now. It’s time to get busy with this complicated recipe!
You start out by putting a little bit of vegetable oil in your cast iron skillet (that has been cleaned and re-oiled because you just had a dog in it). You can use any type of skillet, I just happen to like my cast iron skillet because it makes me feel like I’m in the Little House on the Prairie books. See those scratch marks on the side of the skillet? That’s what happens when you stack cast iron skillets on top of one another. Don’t do that.
Throw your chopped onions in and cook (saute) them until clear/translucent/whatever.
Spend a bunch of time goofing off until you realize that you’re burning the goddamn onions. Then throw the chopped up hot dogs in the skillet and bitch about how stupid you are for not paying attention. And then blame the husband for it because everything is always his fault anyway. Heh.
I stir the hot dogs every once in a while until I get bored and then I start putting the other ingredients in.
Baked beans! Oh, I love baked beans. So much. And yes, I eat them cold straight from the can!
Grandma Tube-top made a special trip into town (minus the tube-top, of course EDITED TO ADD: she was not naked, commenters!) just to purchase this molasses. We don’t usually add molasses to our baked beans – we just use a little bit of brown sugar. I do use molasses in the brine I make for my turkey, but that’s a story for another day.
Add the rest of the ingredients, blahblahblah. I didn’t even try to sneak in any Polish Pottery because baked beans and wieners do not deserve the effort.
Keep cooking it over medium heat until it thickens up and looks like this. That’s when you know it’s done. It doesn’t take that long at all. Maybe 10-15 minutes? So ridiculous to go through all the effort of setting up a crockpot (and cleaning it after) to make this dish. Just fry it up in a skillet and call it a day.
Everyone said it was good, but it’s not going into my recipe book because I can make this stuff in my sleep.
Comments closed due to spammers.
- 3 cans (16 ounces each) pork and beans
- 1 pound hot dogs, cut into 1-inch pieces
- ½ cup ketchup
- 1 small onion, chopped
- ¼ cup molasses
- 1 tablespoon prepared mustard
- In crockpot, combine beans, hot dogs, ketchup, onion, molasses, and mustard. Cover and cook on LOW for 6 to 8 hours.
- Serves 6.
I’m a regular lurker of this site and have tried more than a couple of the recipes posted with great success. I normally don’t comment (see self-description of lurker) but couldn’t resist for this one.
“Grandma Tube-top made a special trip into town (minus the tube-top, of course)” — am I the only one that’s reading that she went topless to the store? *snort*
Sorry, I couldn’t resist.
Ha! I never even thought of it that way (probably because my brain halts that process in order to save my sanity, I’ve been punished enough).
Thanks, now I’m off to drink some bleach. 🙂
I hear vodka is the equivalent of bleach for the mind…
Rhonda – you aren’t the only one. 🙂
I edited it because Shirley will kill me if she found out that y’all were thinking that and I didn’t do something about it. 🙂
Do you not know how to chop onions? I know a site where you can learn how to do that, step by step by step by step by step…
Pioneer Woman say what?
Nance, I prefer them sliced in my hot dog and bean casserole. Also, I KNOW how to chop my onions, I just did it 10 minutes ago to put in the meat loaf we’re having for dinner tonight.
I think we need to change the header to “Every week we’ll half-assedly choose a recipe and then not follow the instructions at all.”
I’m pretty sure everyone should be impressed that we at least used hot dogs!
And again I say “Y’all make me laugh!”
(and, dump this stuff on top of mac and cheese if you really want to eat po’ folks food!)
OMG, you totally have me wanting to try that now! Is it “real” mac and cheese or the kind that comes in the box (which I actually crave at times)?
I have NEVER had from-scratch mac and cheese that I liked as much as the boxed kind. I’m a fancy bitch.
I know, right? I make scratch all the time and while I like it well enough, the box shit is what makes me happy. Must be that artificial bright “orange” color!
Edited to correct a word because I’m obviously STUPID.
Totally and completely the stuff that comes in a box. (preferably cooked in a hot pot in a dorm room because that hot pot is your one cooking utensil allowed… :))
I’m ashamed to admit that I have the stuff in the box because I bought it in bulk at Sam’s Club so there is a good chance that I’m going to make this my lunch. But I’m gonna go ahead and use my stove and a pot because I don’t have a dorm room and the appropriate allowed cooking utensil – I’m such a rule breaker! 😀
Ooh, that looks like more Fire King to me, Robyn! I am not normally a Wieners & Beans person, and I do agree that this is not an attractive dish, but I really want to eat some of this right now. Welcome to month 8 of pregnancy, me. I’ll eat almost anything that has the misfortune to fall into my line of sight.
The wonderful Maureen sent me that bowl and another one just like it – she remembered reading my love of Fire King, and saw them at a yard sale, and snatched them up for something like 50 cents and sent ’em to me! How awesome is that? 🙂
Quit spoiling Robyn because she’s already a brat.
PS: Just kidding – that is so freaking sweet! 😀
She is truly awesome. 🙂
Wow, you guys are making me blush! I will admit to giving out a little squeak of happiness when I saw the dish made it into a photo. So glad you like them, Robyn!
Nice! I need to start going to flea markets again so I can get me some Fire King.
I think you should go all-out with poor folks food and make “sketti” the way they did on Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo.
UGH, those people. They are a blight upon the face of humanity, and I’m saddened that I even know who you’re talking about!!!
That’s not nice, Robyn. What if a member of Honey Boo Boo’s family is reading this and gets their feelings hurt? You’re being mean. Imagine that.
I don’t believe those people can read.
Although I haven’t seen the show (yet) I heard about that sketti business and…NO. I can’t even. 🙂
OK, I just googled Honey Boo Boo Sketti and (A) I can’t believe how many pages it returned and (B) No way, no how, not eating it.
I have managed to avoid watching Honey Boo Boo thus far and will continue to strive to do so. But if I hear one more news story about how much money these people make, I’m going to start calling my children by weird nicknames and make them eat beans and weenies with ketchup and butter on top. We’ll all be rich and hilarious.
You can use an iron skillet on a smooth top stove?
I do too – just used it the other day to make steak (which I marinated first with the London Broil marinade, and it was awesome!)
I think it depends on how old your skillet is. Mine have a raised rim all around the bottom and I was told you couldn’t use them on a smooth top stove. Doesn’t matter to me ’cause I have *real* burners.
I’ve used all kinds of iron skillets on my flat top and have had no problems. I think one of my pans even has some sort of raised deer scene or some such etched into the bottom and it works fine.
I grew up in Texas and ate this shit all the time. Done the way Nance did in a cast iron skillet, but minus the molasses etc. It was just pork and beans and dogs. Hot dogs also done with saurkraut in the same way in the cast iron skillet.
Fast forward 20 plus years and now I can’t stand the taste of pork and beans but love baked beans like Robyn used and use fresh polish sausage with the saurkraut.
And I’m on Nance’s side. 6-8 hours in a crock pot for beans that are already mush when you open the can? WTF!
New way for me to do sauerkraut and hotdogs – I never, ever thought about doing them in a cast iron skillet and now I’m going to have to try it!
or, you know, Lamb Chop. Hee!
And you’re the smartest one of the entire bunch for knowing it! Now tell me this, do you remember the Mike Douglas show?
Felina always reminds me of that stupid puppet when she scrunches up her face that way.
Oh, I do! Totie Fields (comedienne) and Jan Peerce (singer) and John and Yoko as guest host. I remember Mike singing a “medley of his hit” — since he only had one. It was called “The Men in my Little Girl’s Life” for those who care.
A.) I love iron skillets.
B.) The doggie in the skillet is just too much. Gosh this post just made me smile and took some tension right off my back. Thanks ladies. Love!
Miss Say, I’m glad our knucklehead adventures bring about some smiles. There is too little of those lately and it should change. If need be, I will gladly shave a cat for some yuk yuks on here (Fat Julie, I’m lookin’ at you). Heh. Only kidding. Maybe.
I don’t think I’ve served beans and weenies since my kids started attending school all day. But I have one kid who will eat an entire can on baked beans by herself (yeah, we stand downwind afterward) and one that will eat hot dogs out of the refrigerator (he’s a teenage boy, enough said). Perhaps I should make this for dinner tonight. Look kids, Mom cooked!
I can get down with the kid that eats the baked beans out of the can, but the hot dogs? NO. That is gross (even though I know that they’re pre-cooked). True Story: Shirley (aka: grandma tube-top) will not only eat hot dogs straight from the fridge, but she will also eat RAW ground beef. This grosses me out to no end and thank god, my kids never picked up her bad habit. Blech.
I would like this but my husband hates baked beans and barely tolerates hot dogs. I buy them for me and eat them for lunch.
Everything tastes better in a cast iron skillet doesn’t it? I LOVED Felina Marie in there-she was as cute as any kitty cuisine inspector. (Sorry, Robyn and kittens!)
I remember the Mike Douglas show and watching it with my Mom oh-so-well. I am OLD!
Do you remember Totie Fields as a guest host? I knew who Lamb Chop was too. I don’t know who most of the current singers on the radio are but I remember all of that stuff. Get off my lawn you whipper snappers all the way!
We watched Mike Douglas, too – my brother would get disgusted and leave the room when Mike Douglas sang, heh.
I didn’t remember Totie Fields so I had to look her up. And then I fell down a rabbit hole of You Tube roasts…Don Rickles, Dean Martin, OMG, what a trip! Thank you for blowing up my afternoon because I didn’t get shit done. Hee!
I love Lamb Chop, her little voice always cracked me up. I do remember the Mike Douglas show, it was on after school and we watched it every day. He always seemed like such a nice person!
I’m not much a a baked bean fan, except when you add ground beef and bacon to them. In fact, that sounds like something that would be good for dinner this week. Nothing but rain, wind and cool temperatures here-a little stick to the ribs food is in order!
I meant “OF a baked bean fan”, why do I always see my mistakes right after I hit the post comment button?
From my mother as I was making this dish: “You know, some people put ground beef in their baked beans.” I remember eating it when I was young and not liking it. I might have to try it some day to see if I changed my mind.
Robyn! You’ve never had a can of pork and beans?????? Yummy! On the nights my Dad had to cook for us, we often had “beans and wienees.” But he only added ketchup to the beans and hot dogs. Delish!